Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : Childrens

The damage I (and I say "I" because I won't speak for another) have caused to each and every one of you is something that I will have to live with for the rest of my life. 

I have to live with the fact that I came into your lives and I chose to take on that mother roll,i chose to fall in love with each of your personalities,i chose to learn what your favorite foods were and which ones you hated,i chose to learn what made you smile that beautiful smile! I chose to tuck you into your beds and kiss you every night,i chose to learn remedies to heal your upset tummy,i chose to teach you right from wrong and I chose to pick you up if ever you should fall. 

But I also chose to make decisions that would hurt you all. I knew that the second I picked up that beer bottle and there was tension in our home,that it wouldn't end well and you would all have to see the outcome of it all.

No I did not give birth to all of y'all but I fell in love the day YOU chose to call me "mom". It was then and there that I should have vowed to never cause you pain,or never allow you to witness the ugly on this earth first hand in a place you should have been able to feel safe. I should have been a better mother because you loved me enough to give me that title! 

And now here I am,and you over there,the pain in my heart,is a pain not even time can repair. Just know that I'm sorry and I love you,until infinity ends.