Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : N/A

What I've known is sometimes too much, sometimes not enough.
I've known happiness when I'm truly content in life. Happy with where I am and who I've become as a person.
I've known pride when I accomplish something I've worked hard for. For doing the best I can with what I have.
I've known pleasure just sitting in a peaceful spot watching the sunset with beautiful colors.
I've known sadness when I lose a pet or when something doesn't go as I planned it in my head.
What I've known the most in my life though is hurt. Hurt from the cancer I battled. The broken bones I've had. The life I threw away for a cheap thrill. The worst hurt I do believe is the hurt from someone I loved. They said they loved me but then left so easily. The promises broken. The loss of my unborn children. The one person I would've done anything for could not be there when all I needed was a presence, a kiss, a look in the eyes and telling me everything is going to be alright. I'm here for you.  I love you.... That hurt I don't think I can ever get over. It was so easy for you to leave. So easy for you to not even say goodbye. I wish I didn't love you because the pain is too much and I have no one to turn to. You were that person.Now your gone and you've moved on and I'm hurt feeling stupid because I still care. I wish I didn't. Please come back I scream in the night. But you won't. I'm hurt, I'm broken and nothing I do can help me. Only you could've. I'm sorry I'm such a mess but you caused it. I try to be strong but inside I'm shattered. Nobody knows and I would look like a fool to let anyone know. I miss you and I wish you were here. I hear somebody coming so I have to quit writing and wipe away my tears... This is what I've known.