My Cry For Redemption Read Count : 20

Category : Poems

Sub Category : N/A
I'm starting to think that I should really change my name;
This gut wrenching feeling when I hear it stays the same;

I'm not the pretty little girl that I used to be;
Straight As and honor rolls,
'The perfect little Blondie';

I didn't know,
i trusted you,
I was thirteen;

Acting older than my age,
Maturing simply;

Painful memories,
Silent screams,
The perfect symphony;

I should've known, I didn't know;
Through your mask, pedophilia bleeds; 

Your voice sends shivers up my skin,
Spiders crawling from within;

I'll take your life but that's a sin,
A night of stolen innocence;

The night when violent thoughts were born,
A devil wreaking havoc in a silent storm;
 
You asked me if I wanted you to make me cry;

A broken nod,
A new picture,
Showing children grotesque porn;

Now in my head you live rent free,
An all consuming flame that just won't leave me be;
I bleed myself at night hoping to put you out, 
It's not my fucking fault, although I'm still in doubt;

You looked through me and whispered that I couldn't fucking tell;
Had your hands up on my body,
I'm in fucking hell;

I closed my eyes and hoped for sleep,
Hoped for death-
I hoped for peace-

I feel so gross,
Feel disgusting;
Ripping skin from my body,
A hell that beckons peacefully;

Now, Every time I'm touched,
I'm fucking thinking of you;
Tortured memories that I have to fucking live through;
It's like the way a smell takes you back when you were young;
Ironic memories,
Life without a tainted tongue;

Now, I can't fucking breathe;
Drowning in an ocean of the blood you made me bleed;
Just want some retribution,
I'm fucking sixteen;
I don't think I deserve this,
Going fucking crazy;

Sandpaper on my body,
Your hands were everywhere;
I felt you underneath my skin,
You don't belong there;
You don't deserve to see the fucking tears you made me cry;
Don't deserve to see the blood spilling from my eyes;

I know you fucking loved it, and that's what made it worse;
The devil came and played with me and left me fucking cursed;
I know you wanted me to bleed, 
You wanted me to hurt;
You don't deserve my body,
You don't know what I'm worth;

I get panic attacks that wreck my fucking body;
I'm seeing fucking red,
My visions getting spotty;
I think I bled too much tonight,
Should leave a note,
But what to write?
I fall asleep,
Grip the blade tight;
I mean it's what he wanted,
Right..?
~RaeVyn H3llfire~

Comments

  • No Comments
Log Out?

Are you sure you want to log out?