Category : Stories

Sub Category : Drama

Billy couldn’t huv gotten far fir god sake. He cannae see or hear nout. Well for now that is. Fuck knows whairs he’s ended up. Thir wis no evidence of him being kidnapped. No fingerprints or even weapons were found at the scene ay the crime. Just one bloody hand print on the wall which belonged to Billy’s dad whae wis noo deceased alang with his ma. Ah’ve no been in contact wi James or Robbie since. Ah’m just lying here in my bed wi ma covers ower me looking at ma posters ay ma favourite bands. Nirvana, Oasis, Blur, Mettalica, INXS, AC/DC and The Who. Ah don’t know whit ah’m daeing. But ah’m enjoying it tho. Although I am getting bored oot ma nut. Ah think aboot daeing something productive, but ah don’t know what. Ah could play ma Super Nintendo. Naw, ah’ve beet aw the games oan thair. Ah could go fir walk. Naw, too dangerous, Robbie could appear wi that glass shard and stab fuck oot me. Ah could go see James but he’s probably busy the day. Ah continue thinking aboot whit gonnae do the day but then ah hear a knock at the door. Ah’m in the hoose by masel and Ma maw is at work. Ah go doon the stair and look through the peephole. Its Robbie, but it doesnae look as though he’s batshit crazy. He jist looks normal. So ah open the door. – Awrite mate? Ah sais. 

He’s haudin big yella torches and a black sports bag whilst smoking a fag. Ah notice James is behind um wi a bandage oan he’s nose. – Ah’m Sorry Robbie sais. – For? Ah sais. – For chasing wi a glass shard. And ah’m sorry fir smashing the coffee table and ah’m sorry fir breaking yir nose James. 
Its awrite mate. Ye apologized tae me earlier James sais 
Yeah but a wanted him tae hear me apologize tae ye personally 
Right James sais 
Can we come in? Robbie sais 
Ah don’t see why not ah reply 
We go intae the living room and Robbie pits the black sports bag oan the flair. – Ma maw wisnae happy aboot the coffee table Ah sais. – Aye, well ah sais ah wis sorry Robbie sais. – Whits wi the black bag and the yella torches? Ah asks. – Whir gonnae go look fir Billy. James sais. – Eh? Ah sais. – We’re gonnae look fir Billy. – Are you serious? Ah sais. – Aye Robbie sais. – Whit? In the dark? Ah asks – Aye James sais. – Are yous two oot yer nut? Ah sais. – Look, do you want tae find um or no? – Aye, but … Robbie cuts me off – But whit? He sais. – But that’s no oor joab, we’ll let the polis take care ay it ah sais. – Och, Fuck the Polis! Robbie sais – Look ah cannae ma maws gonnae be hame in hauf an oor and if she’s finds oot ah’m oot then she’s gonnae kill me. Ah sais looking at ma watch – Look, if ye want tae stey here and be a mummy’s boy then go ahead ah’m no bothered, jist dinae come crying tae us when we’ve foond um. Robbie sais Ah look at the clock and it sais 4 o’clock. – Och, fuck it whair we looking first? Ah sais picking up a Big yella torch. – That’s mair like it. Robbie sais. – Whir, gonnae look at the West Calder train station first. James sais – Train station? Why the fuck would he be thair? – Cause that’s we whair we take drugs a lot? Robbie sais. – But he’s Deaf and Blind how the fuck would he know whair it wis? – Ah mean ye nivir know he could be thair Robbie sais. – Quite possibly James sais. - Right for fucks sakes lets go then.

We headed doon tae the train station feeling a bit scared. – Even, he was kidnapped, would we still be able to find him? Ah sais. – Ah don’t know. But ah hope we dae find um. Cos ah’m no gonnae look aw ower Livingston fir um. 
And what if we don’t? James asks
We will, ah promise ye’s that. We will find Billy. Naw ken whit? Ah take back whit ah said earlier. Ah’ll search aw ower the Lothian tae find that cunt. Even if he’s somehow goat tae Edinburgh or Glasgow then will um. 
Aye, we’re The Wee Jocks, we’ll stoap at nothing tae find oor pal! James sais. 
Even if he’s in the Pacific Ocean we’ll fucking find um awrite! ah sais 
We continued oor positive energy fir Billy for a while until Robbie ruined it with one ay ehs Misogynistic punch lines. – Even if he’s porking the queen we’ll find um. We jist stares at um. – Whit? He sais – Really Robbie? Me and James sais – Whit? He a Rangers fan is he no? Robbie sais. – Whits that goat tae dae wi anything? James asks. – Well, there’s nothing else Rangers fans love more than to Shag the queen. Robbie sais. – Shut up! Me and James sais. – Ah’m no wrong tho ah’m ah? Robbie asks. Ah just shook ma heid and continued walking. – James tell me ah’m no wrang. Robbie sais. – Ah don’t know Robbie! James sais. – Awrite man, Just saying Robbie sais. We continued walking doon and we eventually reached the West Kirk of Calder. We noticed something oan the ground. It looked a pair of sunglasses. The white round type that Kurt Cobain wore when he wis alive. 
Kurt Cobain Sunglasses? Ah sais. 
Billy hud a pair ay them. He scribbled ehs intials oan the side ay it jist tae remember that they wir his. 
Really? James sais 
Aye, thir wir the exact same colour as that Robbie sais
White isnae a colour it’s a shade Ah sais 
Shut up ya specky geek! Robbie sais 
James picked up the glasses and looked oan the side ay it and noticed the intials of Billy.




                   BG


Ah didn’t know his last name started wi a G ah sais
That’s because ye huv nae known um fir that long Robbie sais 
Here whits that? James sais 
Ah notice thir wis a pair ay boots sticking oot the bushes. It looked like Billy’s shoes. Ah thought Billy wis stuck in the bushes. Ah pulled oan the boots but sadly Billy wisnae thair. – Fuck! Ah sais. – At least wir getting close James sais. - Lets keep walking doon, he might be at the train station. Robbie sais. We kept walking doon and discovered a smashed mirror at entrance of the train station. Robbie did the stupidest thing in the world when yer looking fir a deaf person. – BILLY!! He Shouts. BILLY!!!! – Whit are ye daeing? Ah asks. – Calling fir um. BILLY!!! – He’s deaf ya tosspot! Ah sais. – Oh aye. Robbie sais. – Och this stupid wir nivir gonnae find um! James sais. – Aye, how the fuck can we find um if it’s a train station?!?! – Ah don’t know Robbie sais. 

We thought aboot going hame but then Robbie thought ay another idea. – Here whit aboot the school? – Eh? Ah sais.
He could be at the school Robbie sais 
Aye, maybe James sais 
C’moan man there’s nae wey that’s possible. Ah sais 
Mate! Stop being sae fucking negative! Thir’s still a chance he could be thair! Robbie sais 
Ah Know but ah dinae want tae break intae Northwood high.
Wir no breakin’ in! Robbie yelled Wir only lookin’ around the area fir um! If we cannae find um then will huv caw it a night. Robbie sais
Come on Callum thir might still be a chance James sais 
Fine! But if somebody catches us then ah’m blaming you! Ah sais walking off 
We start walking up the hill tae whair the church wis. Ah’m starting tae git cauld. Ma hauns ur starting tae like thir frozen. Ah feel as tho ah’m starting tae become an ice cube, that’s funny cos ma baws ur starting tae feel like ice cubes. Robbie hus put ehs hauns in the poakits ay ehs brownish over coat. Ah cannae tell if ehs getting a fag or ehs keeping his hauns warm. Ah’m aboot tae dae that in a minute because ma hauns feel like fucking snow. Ah can’t imagine that wir that far away noo. Northwood highschool isnae that far away fi where we aw live. Ah can see the Black outline ay the building fi miles away. – Ah don’t know how ah feel aboot this mate Ah sais. – Yeah, Robbie can we no look somewhere else? We wir noo in the dodgiest part ay West Calder. Purpin street. – Lads it’ll be fine. Ah ken folk in these parts any wey. This is whir ah git most ay ma skag fi. Of course ya dae ya Junkie prick. Ah bet he fucking touches wains here a’knaw! Mind you this street does huv a nursery in it so Robbie might huv the opportunity tae take photos with his mind and save tae ehs virtual wank bank the dirty cunt.

Although thinking about Nursery takes me back tae a simpler time. Before anybody gave a shit aboot anything. Much simpler times they were, playing in the sandpit, cutting oot bits ay magazines, newspapers and books and sticking them tae bits ay paper. Aw the times ur gone noo and ah will no ever experience anything like that again. Time doesnae stoap and wir getting aulder by the minute and us young folk dinae realise it. that’s why they ask us “Why dae ye want tae be when ye grow up?”. Ah remember in Primary school Billy used tae eywis say he wanted to be a tractor. Naw, no a tractor driver, a tractor. Which even fir eight year auld me ah know ye couldnae dae. Ye think stupid shit as wain a’knaw. Like ye think Superhero’s like Batman and Spiderman ur real when in reality they urnae. Ah feel really bad fir the folk whae wanted tae be Superhero’s when they wir aulder. Ah remember ma Brar (Barry) wanted tae be Spiderman when wis wee because he hud saw Spiderman oan the telly and that ken? Ah remember wan Christmas he goat ah Spiderman Onesie and the web shooters which really jist made ay silly string and he would go roond the hoose trying climb the wa’s as well as shoot the silly string at me pretending ah wis the green goblin or something.

Also when he wid say his name he widnae respond tae that, instead he wid respond wi tae the name ‘Spiderman’ or ‘Barman’. And there wis the occasional catchphrases such as “Ah’m gonnae chef you up!” or “Ah’ll web you up!”. Although this wis when ah wis aboot wan year auld so ah cannae remember fuck all at that age so it wis ma auld folk that told me aw that pish. Anywey, ah don’t really remember Barry that well now because ah wis wee and when ah wis six ma maw n da split and ma da nivir look Eftir Barry because ay eh wis alcoholic and ma maw refused tae look Eftir um. So when Barry wis seven he goat put intae foster care. Ah’ve nivir seen ur heard fi um since. Infact ah can’t remember whit the cunt looks like. Its been ten years, all ah know is that ehs foond a family that love um. Ah’d hate tae see Billy go into care, well if we find um of course. Because he’s been like a Brar tae me ken? Ah’d nivir felt like that wi anybody else tho. Ah’d greet if he went intae foster care, but if we find him that looks like it that’s what’ll happen. Ah’m gonnae miss um if he does. Ah remember when ah wis in P4 Ma maw n da hud jist split and wis sitting at the table greeting ma eyes oot and Billy came up tae me and asked: - Are you ok? Ah looked up and cleared ma eyes and sais: 

Aye, ah’m fine 
Are you sure? 
Naw ah reply 
Whits wrong? He asks 

Ah gave um a recap oan whit hud happened and he sais: - You know why    don’t ye come sit wi us? – Really? Ah reply – Yeah, ah know you’ve jist lost a brother why don’t ah be brother fi another mother? My face widened and ah smiled and ah replied with ah: - Yes ah sais aboot tae greet again. – You want tae shake oan it? he sais haudin ehs haun oot. – Yeah ah sais shaking ehs haun. Ah touch ma haun as we kept walking to the school. Ah could feel ah tear roll doon ma face as ah inhale and exhale. Ah notice James is looking at me. – You awrite Cal? He sais. Ah look at um – Eh? Aye ah sais wiping ma tear oaf ma face. – Ok James sais. Robbie notices that we’ve stopped walking and sais: - Oi! Whit you two bufties taulking aboot airt thair? – Nothing! Ah sais – Right, well come on then! Billy isnae gonnae find ehsel ya know! – Ah know! He’s Blind! Ah reply. He jist shook ehs heid at me. We continue walking. Robbie is smoking a fag as usual and James is playing oan ehs game boy, whilst ah’m walking with my hauns in ma pockets feelin’ aw glum. – Right thairs the school thair! Robbie sais – Oh really Robbie ah thought it wis ah sky scraper! Ah sais sarcastically – Oi Fuck you! He sais. We approach the school very slowly. Thirs security cameras ootside the building. – Here, ah don’t know aboot this ken? Robbie then replies tae me in the most-calmest way possible. 
Look, ah know you’ve been through hell the night. If ye dinae want tae go look fir um that’s fine by me. Ah’ve put yous two through enough pish awready. 
Ok ah reply 
That reply wis extremely oot ay character fir Robbie. Ehs nivir spoke like that tae us ivir in aw oor puff. Nivir even wance. Even if any ay us reply like that he wid usually reply wi something moany and bitchy. Ah leant airt tae James and whispered: - that wis a bit oot ay character fir Robbie eh? – Aye, ehs never said anything so calm. He replied. – Ah know it’s weird ah sais. We went walking roond the school but saw Naebody. Ah wis starting imagine the worse. Billy couldnae huv been here and if he wis, it would ay been it would’ve been a miracle if he wis. – Robbie ah don’t think he’s here James sais. – Well, maybe wir no looking hard enough he sais. He goes intae ehs Black sports bag and pulls oot a Camcorder. – Ah’m gonnae set up these Camcorders overnight tae see if we get anything. He sais opening the rest ay the bag tae show us the rest ay thum. – Fucking hell! James sais – Whair the hell did ye git so many Camcorders fae? Ah sais. and he replied with the most Robbiest thing I’ve ever heard. – Ah fucked the employee at Curry’s tae git thum. He sais taking a smoke eh his fag. – Whit the whole fucking stock??!!?! James sais. – Aye he sais. Questions started tae circulate through ma heid like: “Why would ye need the full stock ay camcorders anywey?” Naw, fuck it: - Why would ye need the full stock ay camcorders anywey? Ah mean wir probably gonnae need a few anywey. He looked at me and sais: you really don’t want tae know! – Whit dae ye mean? Ya filming a porno or something? James asks – Like ah sais you really don’t want tae know! He replied. – Awrite ah reply. He sets wan up in a wee bush underneath a tree. – Let’s hope nae Ned finds that and fucks wi it Robbie sais – Ah don’t think they will if it that well-hidden ah reply. – Aye but ye ken whit the neds ur like he replied. No ah don’t Robbie ya idiot. We went back tae the train station and set wan up thair as well as set wan ootside Billy’s hoose, in case he wanders back tae ehs gaff wi oot knowing it. – Whit aboot the battery life oan the camcorders. Ah asks. – Nah its awrite, they’ll last aw night. It wis at this moment the sky became darker and the street lights wir coming oan. – Here ah better git hame. Ma maw’s probably wondering wir ah went. – Aye, fair enough ah’m gone hame a’knaw. Fucking freezing ma baws aff. – Awrite lads huv a great night! Robbie sais very oot ay character. – Whit aboot you? You going hame? James asks. - Naw, Ah’ll jist stey oot here fir a wee while. Might git some skag oaf ma uncle when ah’m walking through Purpin street. 

Looks like the skag thing still thair. ah sais tae James 
Aye he reply
 Oi fuck off! You dinae know whit it’s like tae life ay a drug addict! Its fucking brilliant! Even James wid agree wi me. Aint that right James? He sais 
Ah mean ah wouldnae its great but it’s certainly something He sais 
Nah, C’moan its brilliant! Here why don’t you come tae us tae the abandoned shopping mall at Freeport oan Friday! That’s wir we take aw the skag ken? Robbie sais
Nah ah’m awrite Ah sais 
Naw, C’moan! Before we go back tae School ken? 
He sais he doesnae want tae Robbie! James sais 
Och! Yir a pussy anywey! Robbie replied
What aboot the camcorders? Whits the plan wi them eh? Ah asks 
Ah’ll check oan them in the morning. if there’s anything oan them Ah’ll gie ye’s a ring 
And if there if thirs nothing oan them? 
Then Ah’ll no bother? He sais confused 
Ok! See ye Friday then! James sais walking off 
See ye! Ah sais 
Ah goat back home and ma maw wis a bit worried aboot wir ah hud been. But other than that ah’m fine. As soon as we find Billy