Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : N/A

"In the end, we discover that to love and let go can be the same thing. I sat with my anger long enough until she told me her real name was grief. And grief, as we know, is the final form of love. The truth is, once you have loved someone, it is too late. You cannot possibly un-love them. It is like trying to catch the wind. All we can do is mourn them. We mourn them for the rest of our lives."
– Elizabeth Gilbert,

Could not have said it any better myself.
I wish there was a way to unlove him.
I really do, because I'm so tired.
So very tired of this life.
I wish I could end it all.
What I would not give to have my final day, my final breath.
For my eyes to close for the final time.
To not feel the pain of my heart that constantly breaks.
I never wanted this. I never asked for this.
All this mess because I fell in love with his ex-best friend 
before him.
Then I tried to forget him by doing things I shouldn't just to numb the pain of losing him.
I lost myself in all of it. 
I regret my life. I regret everything that I had done.
I wish for my life to be over.
Thinking about him all the time, having to feel this pain every single day of my life. 
I can't take this no more.
What am I still living for when I'm already dead inside?
When this life already feels like death for me anyway. Just death of a different kind.

Silent Angel.