Category : Audio
Sub Category : Spoken word Poetry
"I wish I was more than words on a page."
Silenced.Although there was a storm in my head and unfinished conversations that I finished in the dark of my bedroom,I never voiced out when another ear could hear me and although there were times I really was innocent I never argued because I was taught that I fit the role of the guilty.Although everyone's pain hung on my shoulders I was called selfish and even then I swallowed back the tears and thought maybe they couldn't see the weight I carried.Although I fought so hard for a love that didn't blame me,I learnt to settle for the one that came with pain because I was taught that I couldn't be loved without the pain,I was taught to always pay a price for love and I learnt that I would never have enough to pay for love no matter who it came from.I learnt that everyone else was better than I could ever be and that my struggles were fickle because people went through worse.I was taught that I nagged and so I learnt to never complain about the pain because I didn't want to be a bother and although my whole life was a struggle I learnt to smile at the light and open my skin in the dark and for every cut there was no scream because I learnt that I didn't help and that a girl like me was born to go through the pain of life with no applause and even though I wished my life would be easier I knew i would never deserve an easy life but what l'a never know is whose sin I am paying for and why I have to have it hard so I tell myself that I have It hard just so the people I care about can have it easier and even though I wish I could rest my back and look up to someone I know I can only be Strong and silent but I wish I could say something then many my tears wouldn't taste so salty and maybe my heart wouldn't feel so heavy and maybe then I can truly smile and not make use of the mask that comes on after a night of crying and even now I hate that it's a pity party here and i hate who I am and how I feel about all that I've been taught and all that I've known and I wish I could break free but my feet hurt and my eyes don't work so well anymore.I just wish I had whispered to myself and told myself how lovely and pretty I am then maybe these voices would never have won and maybe now I'd have been happy but I didn't and so they won and now I look at peoples feet because I don't worth seeing their eyes and I guess I wasn't made for a happy ending after all.
Neither was he. Which means we are made for eachother. Destined for nothing. Destined to lose.. ..eachother in the end. destined to ruin eachother. We don't get a happily ever after.
We get to destroy eachother. 😞And so this is the part where we say our goodbyes. We part ways, and one of us forgets the other. Hopefully in another life time, we will meet-"
"and this isn't where the story ends. We pick up from where we left off and we live the happily ever after we never had. Maybe in anathor life
But. "even then, even now as I speak these words, just know I love you. I'm waiting. I'm waiting for you to come reach me and live out our life.
Goodbye." And as she read the last line, I felt the sting of tears run down my face. She read my beginning, middle and end. But little did she know, she was the story I sought after my whole life. My reader, dreamer from far away.
"It's okay. You can close it. I won't be upset. This is the last page of my story, but yours isn't over yet, I hope you have a good tale to tell at--the end of it all. Goodbye, dear reader."
"Well... I guess this is where the story ends. No more pages to flip and words to read. I know you have other books to read. It may hurt, but-""if there is one thing you might have learned in my story, you aren't really in it, and this whole book about me learning to let go and move on.-"
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