Category : Diary/Journal
Sub Category : N/A
When things go wrong or is not going my way, i often ask what did I do wrong? Instead of what have I not done that could have improved the situation.
I'm not sure if how i internalise my thoughts and feelings are helping me or making things worse for me. I wonder all the time what did I do wrong to bring me to a situation i dislike.. i don't want to think of what could i have done more to improve my situation because I feel tired. I feel like I put in a lot of effort but the other party don't do anything. The least they could do is appreciate my efforts but they most of the time don't even do that.
So I keep asking myself why bother? Why do so much? Why must it always be me? In a relationship, there must be give and take. I feel like I've taken a lot with very little to give back. I've taken up alot of other's time and I should leave so they don't waste their time on me anymore.. it is a negative concept but being positive is too tiring. Its a lot of work. Im too tired.
Am I wrong?
I think we've all been there at some point in our lives. Yes, being positive can be exhausting and draining at times BUT if you are naturally a positive person, you can't fake it. Granted, it is sometimes a lot easier to throw in the towel and just not put in the effort anymore. But at the end of the day, you are the one who has to live with your choices. Just think about that. Anyway, this is very well written and a very good read. 💜
May 05, 2021