Dilapidated Soul Read Count : 13

Category : Poems

Sub Category : N/A
When your muscles ache it feels like gained strength,
When your nerves are shot it's a feeling that will stop,
When your mind drifts it'll come back in shifts,
When your souls shattered it'll stay battered.

Never have such weighted griefs pushed me so far back beyond belief,

The beginning is a fairy tale of not long ago, when everything all the sudden failed,

My muscles were already dense with stress as the unimaginable had me on the fence,

The disparaging lies of a trusted spouse were exclaimed just to give me a rouse,

The traps were set, with all bets on my failure, to accept the horrors she kept, 

The tenacity to spit her unclean audacity in my face, was a true test of my faith,

Didn't mean I could conceive the shame of a false dream that made me bleed,

The muscles couldn't mend the pain she afflicted, the nerves couldn't comprehend,

The shaking is starting as my mind was departing, the pain is charting,

To prevent disaster and become scattered, I had to compartmentalize for those who mattered,

The shaking never stopped, but my mind drifted back, for I was facing a dreadful black,

Seeking the truth while protecting the youth, I was chasing a forbidden fruit,

The easy way through seemed distant in the blue, but I would've never knew,

That the one I chose was always putting on a show, to have my life on foreclose,

Nothing could compare to the realization, that she would destroy everything in damnation,

The mind stopped drifting, but the choices became blurry, I needed to act in a hurry,

I was in love with misery which neglected the nursery, I protected the nursery from misery,

This made choices endless as the solution always seemed careless,

No easy way out, but remembering how I began, my soul started to shed, closing this loves lifespan,

Without mom and dad together, I shielded them from the gloomy weather,

Never knowing of how dad really felt, they would swing around by his belt,

Never knowing of how mom wasn't there, they would run right past her undeclared,

This agonizing pain that they couldn't see, was my burden to bear in heartaches captivity,

Each day would shed a layer upon my Dilapidated Soul, 
each night was etched upon my life's scroll, 
to a hell unquenched under our totem pole,
as it's too late for any kind of damage control, 
Forever paying my dues to the devil's payroll.

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