Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : N/A

I've Gotten Over You

I feel dumb enough to say that I've wasted my time chasing after you. I've spent too many of those lonely nights crying to myself. Wondering why you couldn't see me. I stood too many days, effortlessly trying to show you my appreciation towards you. I wasted 3 years of my life waiting for you to fall for me the way I did for you. And you killed me inside. You put a void in my heart that can't be filled. And it's making my heart turn black. I've told you how I've felt but yet you laugh and you've walked away and continued on with life, forgetting of my feelings. I've given you my attention and put you above my friends, but yet you didn't appreciate anything I did for you. I gave up a lot for you, but you never said thank you. I spent money on you. To buy you the things you liked. Your favorite snacks and treats. I sat and listened to your lectures and complaints. I looked you in the eyes with love, and held you up as a friend. But you looked down on me. I should've listen to them. My friends and family. You're nothing but a heart breaker. Nothing but a fraud. I made you a priority for 3 years. And I now realize that I wasted my time on you. I should've dropped you when my friends encouraged me to. I should've accepted someone who had the same feelings for me instead of chasing after you, but I didn't. I stood by your side. Loyal, like I was a dog. I was a stupid dog. To follow after you the way I did. To give you unconditional love, despite the fact that you showed none towards me. I tried to get close to you so many times... But now, I'm not doing that any more. I've been drowning for so long, ever since you've been pulling me on this leash. I wasn't ashamed to follow you because I was blind. It wasn't you that wasted my time. I did. I wasted it thinking that if I'd keep chasing you, I'd catch you. But turns out you were nothing but a shadow. Nothing but show and tell. I spent days wishing and praying, maybe you'd notice me. I spent years hoping that we still had a chance. I see you in my dreams and I hate it. I can't stand to see your face, because I know if I saw you again that void would get deeper. I can't stand you anymore because you made my heart ache for 3 long years. But now... Now I'm giving you up. You have a girlfriend now and I'm happy for you. I'm nothing to you but a memory that will soon enough be stranded. But that's ok. Because to me you're nothing but another friend that got away. You're nothing but a burden, that's sat on my shoulder for too long. And I have finally let you free. I feel better, when I think of the friendship we have. When I recall the times that I had fell for you. I laugh at myself for thinking that me and you could have been more than friends. But this time, I won't cry when you don't see me. This time, I won't ask God to let you speak to me, or wish that you will one day be mine. This time, I won't give you my all. This time I won't give myself up. This Time. I Won't Make YOU A Priority. Just like you did to me. I'll make you an option. I've gotten over you. And I feel so much better. I've Gotten Over you and it makes me feel happy. I've gotten over you and it's no longer making my heart feel heavy. 

I've gotten over you, and it makes that Void in my heart disappear. I can Live Now. 
Now that 
I've Gotten Over You.