Suicidal Paralysis Read Count : 68

Category : Songs

Sub Category : Rock

I am an forsaken house with shattered windows, 

just an empty hotel for homeless ghosts, they often end up here.

They have disorted, blurry faces with dirty hands that grab me so tight that i fall on my hurting back.


My bed is my grave                        my bed is my last resting place.  my room is just cotton candy of exhaustion, tiredness and Anti-motivation that go hand in hand with my nonexistent will to live.


I loathe time, it plays confusion with my insecurity, 'cause I mostly feel so secure about having the hourglass still so full.       

But one day i'm old.                      My hair will be snow and my bones will be fragile little sticks of young baby trees.                      I will lie down again, like i do for years now, but i will dream as corns of Ash, the insects will chew me to mud.


Life comes in waves, for such a long time now.

I'm a sea animal, too dumb to know that there's the valley of death ahead of me 

So i swim but suddenly my gills cut themselves on the blade of the air. 

I try to fight but real soon i lay dead on mother earth's skin and i rot and i decay and the birds are flyin' circles around me already and they stab me and eat me. 


I wish i would have felt this pain too.   

 I wish i would have seen the inside of the birds, then at least the last few lines of the ending chapter of that life wouldn't have been so boring.                                       

But i was lazy, always sitting on the same seat of the same train, driving the same line. 

It was a beautiful view looking outside. 


Oh, but my eyes and my head hurt, and my legs are tightly tied to the seat. I can do it later. I can do everything later. 

Later, i can live my life. 

But later, is an illusion and i'm waiting through my life like a sleepwalker. 

Comments

  • Dec 06, 2020

  • Dec 06, 2020

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