Category : Blogs

Sub Category : Relationships

LOVE, the simplest and sweetest word to spell but, it's complexity defies all sort of logical reasoning. Love, they say, is what one feels, strong or soft. It could mean patient, kindness and to envy no one. But, however, the one that says 'love is understanding' says it the best!

Well, 'understanding' is crucial in any kind of relationship - for, it helps it to last long. Alas! In today's relationship,  contrary to those days, understanding is more or less a grain of salt in a deep blue sea.

Let's take nothern nigeria as our case study, the atmosphere of this part of the world is saturated with the rhythms of love mantras. The pop-icon you see or the pop-music you listen or the pop-culture you practice everywhere,  it's love. At least,  it's Romeo and Julliet offspring. I dont blame them!

Behavior, according to psychologists is a response to external stimulus internalized. And, the strength and quality of this stimulus determines the way and manner we perceived things. So, the perception of love by the northern youths is directly or otherwise connected to the amount of audio-visual stimulus they encounter with everyday and night.

Even the street dog knows that , northerners have been the highest consumers of Bollywood movies in Nigeria and by extension, in Africa at large. I dont have to tell you indian movies are always about love. The kind of love that no sane society should crave for. Then, kannywood with their india-hausa soyayya version reinforces the former.

So, it's not that surprising we have movies trending like Labarina, Izzar so, so Halitta, Tasirin So, Yaudara a So and more. The theme remains the same, LOVE.

Likewise,  the hausa musical industries,  people like Umar M Sharif, Nura M Inuwa, Hamisu Breaker and the rest, have contributed immensely in reinforcing the pseudo-love among the people of this society.
 
To the extent,  Nura M Inuwa had this to ask, in one of his pop-music, and i quote:
"Wanda bai so ku tambaye shi da mai yake more rayuwa..." meaning ... ' ask he who is not in a relationship with what he EXACTLY enjoys his life? - the emphasis is mine. Meanwhile, Nura M.I. in these lines described love as the only source of bliss and happiness to one's life - without which the life is meaningless. 
Beyond his over exaggeration of love , the statement is intimidating and could poses self-despodence to the one who is not in a relationship.  I would like to disagree with him on this. There is more to life outside relationship as meaningful as it is.

This is the the same when you take a look at the northern social media activities, at least, it is the extention of their offline environment- no less.

Forgive me if this seems to be a little wordy, it all worth it. As we plainly view how this society bowed, in most of its aspect of life, to the power of love, then , it's fair enough to weigh up what this society got in return. Does the love reciprocate? I'm  sorry but , I'm not sure.

What the society got is the highest number of divorcees which translate to many widows roaming the streets. The society also got the shorter lifespan of marriages; to some we count years, and some it last a month, weeks and maybe days. At least, it is a relationship built on assumptions which is faraway from reality. It lacks understanding- it's fake!

Thanks to Gabner, "The more time people spend living in Television world, the more likely they are to believe social reality aligns with reality portrayed on television".  

NMS