BPD Read Count : 15

Category : Poems

Sub Category : N/A
This miserable maelstrom of lows,
Holds me down below the waterline ,
Where I can't open my eyes,
 hearing is nulled ,
And I'm left with  my feelings  to the extreme ,  plus overemphathized. 

All of this for whatever reason 
Has a negative twist ,
An unregulated death wish to live with,
A mesmerizing force so menacing
It feels like I'm metaphorically 
Drowning in meloncholy .
Literally dwelling figuritively,
Outside my head ,  inside my mind , 
What does this mean  who am I to decide .
What if I don't want to believe ,
Why can't  I just override 
These thoughts that I perceive 
As lies ,  from deep inside contrived,
I wonder so often until I cry ,
Beside myself so often am I .

Danger danger anger is there ,
Cut back concern , turn down the care ,
Its not your place to share .
It would be so great 
If I could rationalize this ,
But truth of it is ,
I struggle with faith ,  and 
I grapple with happiness ,
I give in to hate  ,
While living in hopelessness ,
Relentless empitness is 
meaningless openness.

Powerless over loneliness
Means that Tiredness is ubiquitous
Making My life end up as fiction
 my only willingness is bitterness
 I only look forward to contradiction,
Its how I survive in this wilderness..

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