Alone/dreams Read Count : 12

Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : N/A
It's a cliche phrase for sure "i feel alone in a sea of people" and it seems like just that, a phrase. But really when it happens you don't think about the phrase much. Well I'll tell you why im thinking about it now, i was finally able to stand back and look in and im not too sure i like what i see.... I dont like being alone, actually one of my biggest fears is being abandoned, so with that i dont want to grow old or die alone but its seems, even with all the people around me i will. I have friends and family, sure i do i mean really who doesn't? But none of them connect with me anymore. (And yes im 18 but the feelings are still valid) im too old to be with my younger cousins and too young to talk about the world with my aunts. My friends are finding people, i mean significant others or other friends, at the same time giving up on their dreams. I hardly have hobbys that could include my mother even tho we are so much a like and vise versa if that makes sense. But im here trying to balance my dreams and my reality finding that no one is doing the same. So focused on just the dreams or just thier personal reality that its the same day in and out, and they are happy with this. Me? Im not i try to find the time to do both but reluctantly im coming around to the idea that i either need to chase my dreams or die in my own mediocre reality. I think ill be happy when my dreams are my reality but its soo far away and at the moment im alone, stuck deciding on dreams or reality. I have a shot a good one too. The people that made it before i did in the world i want to be in think i can make it to where they did and past. They think i can be a house hold name but for now i think the only place my name is known is in my own house. So yea i suppose im a house hold name. Alone trying to chase my dreams. 

Comments

  • Deeply honest

    Jan 12, 2020

  • Jan 12, 2020

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