Standing Tall Read Count : 142

Category : Articles

Sub Category : Miscellaneous
I know that I’m certainly not alone in feeling the sting of disappointment, the weight of sorrows, and the pain of loss. Ultimately I cannot choose who will value me, who’ll be loyal, who'll always be in my corner to have my back, and I won't always understand why some simply choose to pick up and disappear. 

However, there’s still a comfort that comes from trying - from making that effort, even after disappointments. As the saying goes, “nothing ventured is nothing gained". I cannot hope to win every game, but no win can ever come without trying. As much discomfort as I now feel in my current losses, I can still look back upon how much more devastating everything was in comparison years ago, when I was mired in depression and anxiety. 

Back then, my thoughts would quickly devolve into “what ifs” and before I knew it, I’d have talked myself out of taking any risks, putting myself out there, or more succinctly - avoiding putting myself in a position to make any progress or gains. Thankfully I’ve learned that those things are not a life sentence, nor an incurable condition, rather uncomfortable obstacles that must be surmounted with time and consistent effort. 

No matter who or what I have lost in my life over the years, I still have my self-respect. So much of my happiness is quite frankly tied up in how well I measure up to my own expectations and standards. To know opportunity is knocking and not open the door, is to slump uncomfortably on the other side of it in tears, knowing I just essentially lost whatever could have been gained. 

It hurts to get back up after you’ve fallen. I know it much better than I’d like to admit. I know what it is to feel disappointed in myself from not trying, as well as how it feels to fail in the process of making the effort, whether from mistakes or simply a lack of understanding. Here’s the big difference, at least I know I tried. No matter the amount of mistakes I’ve made, I will continue to try to be better. In spite of heartaches, flakey friends and outright hurtful people I’ve encountered, I keep listening for the knock of opportunity to meet better, kinder, more loving souls with whom to fill my life. 

If I give up before I try, that’s the real failure. I may be hurting for now, and that’s ok. I just need to keep getting up after getting knocked down, and keep on reaching upward. I believe in myself and my ability to rise higher, in spite of what has happened, where I am now, who has hurt me or why I may sometimes feel powerless. I find strength by taking it in this life. As with working out at the gym, I definitely need periods to rest too, after which I can get right back up and add resistance. 

I will keep on trying. I may not succeed at everything or with everyone, and that’s ok. At least I know that I tried.

Comments

  • Nov 02, 2019

  • Maurice  Beres

    Maurice Beres

    Effort is often ignored when the goal is not reached 🦋success is never achieved without the attempt 🦋when we appreciate our own desire to persevere it is a strength- building tool we can use over and over It makes our accomplishments even sweeter Whether others acknowledge this or not we are stronger and wiser and can share Our pride with those who care🦋 Zee 🦋this is such a comprehensive piece and wonderfully written 🦋 As usual 🦋🦋🦋🦋❤️

    Nov 03, 2019

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