Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : N/A

I spent so many years asking myself repeatedly why people always choose to play me. I spent so many nights gathering distant reasons why I was the one who was being played, taken advantage of and feel the hurt all by myself. I kept asking the same old questions after another unanswered question. I kept doubting what I have, kept spying what I lack, kept comparing what I've got and kept filling my gaps with screaming failures.

I always love without shortage, I always care without asking anything in return. I always give love exactly the same goddamned thing I wanted to feel back. I questioned if I was enough. I always wonder why I was unappreciated. I always wonder if I was just loving too much or loving too less.

For a long time, I wondered what made people play and betray me.... why I was always the one who was left behind. 

Today, I realize I've been asking the wrong question for so long.

Today, I stop asking why they left. 
Today, I ask myself why I stayed.