Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : N/A

I'm not what you want. I'm not what anyone wants. That has been proven time and time again. Everyone walked out, and you did too. But unlike the others, you came back. I don't know why. You feel bad? You only want my body? You don't want to be alone? Many thoughts race through my head because I don't deserve you. Night after night I cry, and tell you my real thoughts, which drove you to leave the first time. Now I'm constantly terrified that you'll walk out again. It was painful the first time. It was pain I've never felt before, but the next time will be amplified. Without you, I'm just a depressed nobody trying to fight for my life in vain. Maybe it's time I gave up. I've already tried before. In the end, you'll leave. Just like everyone else. So, I'm sorry that you fell in love with me. I'm sorry I fell in love with you. I'm sorry I'm depressed, constantly worried, constantly anxious, constantly questioning, the opposite of what you want and need. I'm sorry for being alive.