Category : Stories

Sub Category : Suspense/Mystery

Every single day I wait for something to get better or for it all to end. Inside my head thoughts fly unorganized jumbled together and mixed. I've noticed that maybe I need to change just one thing so I try I decide no longer do I wish to live in a dream no longer do I wish to go off into my head isolate myself which isn't easy because I've done it for so long and I keep trying to tell myself that I like it I like to be alone but then I look at everybody and I see groups and I think one day I want that for me and then it causes me to relive in my dreams which I keep fighting to not do maybe I should try to change something different something smaller so I do I choose do not associate with people that I have known to associate with and a bit of me feels a little more at ease knowing they no longer will I be labeled being around ones that have really bad labels but I'm even more alone now can I watch before which is crossed my fear to Skyrocket I've let go of some family could not really let them go just decided to be out of their lives not from anything that I did but because they're too much and that added with the ones I used to associate with no longer associating with I've just isolating myself so much more but maybe I need to be isolated to grow that's just too much in my head I just wish you would shut up or at least organize itself or have meaning purpose that I'm aware of but that ain't going to happen not at this moment not snap of a finger no one said it's going to be a long drawn-out process I'm not sure if I'm going to make it through before I snap take myself out of the picture which it's all a matter of who's looking at it and when they're looking at it some would say selfish some would say protecting,or selfish, or weak. selfish because you just trying to find peace and be free from the torment that you put yourself through on a daily basis. You could be protecting because you're doing things to make your loved ones devastated and they live in constant worry. Week because you here unable to be like the rest of the world and just push through no matter how you look at it death is final whether you take your life or someone takes it from you or there's an accident or its natural whether you deserve it whether you don't deserve it whether you're young or old end of a conscious mind and there's a beauty in that is it a living mind Envy and could seek pleasure in finding it's truth when I say that's his final I don't mean it's deep end because you can come back and relive it just different character whether it be a boy or girl or an animal how many times are we going to be reincarnated why are only some reincarnated and others are not either way that's enough ranting thank you for reading!