Category : Blogs

Sub Category : Spirituality

Im big enough to apologize and admit my dumbass was wrong.didnt i look stpuidly an ass.but yup back to respect and friendship i must still stand to my letters from last night a chance to be happy and no longer alone.of a bright future no longer ALONE in the darkness but a sober life in general of a future of great and adored life one on one..even tho our last night well morning of our last goodbye kiss.ive done forgave him for his past actions done to me.it wouldnt be a positive life if i hadnt..still i dont feel the same but sum wur in my heart and soul i do and love him but i must still go on..no more being sad or crazyness over something from the past.i didnt say or mention thats was our last and goodbye.i did say after i today im done with the drugs for good and ever im surely done..okay peepee girl showered Im not stinky no more of laughter and fun.with the unspoken last night i cant believe i pumped myself up and walked my beautiful butt over to his house to see.i was wrong but now that makes the both of us in a certain way..he's still GOING TO be my once a guy i loved with his beautiful brown bright eyed somebody differnt not the serious scary guy..what we have in common is that we both love christ jesus our lord and savior.were both alpha and omega childern of God .at one time we used to be mary and joseph but i couldnt handle the part of them not living together,i had to jump to another person to let go and move on but all though he is blessed and going to be missed.now im eve,the tree of knowledge of good and evil,teacher and mother of all living things,people.. but not the dead its not a reason said about that really just like my bridesgroom said no need to weep or mourn..today is a new day ahead of me i cant wait to explore it in this next week and having someone to actually go to church along with me..thats the only thing really what caught my ear and i said happily i would give him a chance.rather if just friends and sum reason its not working out i still have a new church date on sundays and sunday nights..i hope they speak english there and not all spanish but im sure im smart enough to keep up..besides studying ahead of time i basically will already had read it so i wont be to unsure or lost..now over coming the shyness is what im kinda worried about plz lord dont let me freeze up and have a panic attack or muchless die..lol..calm down moses im him no longer but eve to save the fruitful loving day..if you must know moses had stage fright.awe poor brother in christ.big as my thots and soul i shouldnt be worried but i am humble quiet as ever..i choice not to entertain on fb or look to be talked down on for my past life history.im to grown to argu over history that makes no sense to mostly the whole wide world so ima continue to stay greatful and humble..only if i can remember not to get mad and send out a fire of blaze.or to jump out for joy durning my praise to father singing of happiness for him to hear idc if you like my off tone singing its to my first love from begining to end myself the morning bright star of my off spring david..wow I have a split and several of me born inside,people of great love for our father above,also i can be a arkangel ready for battle or who i want to be feel at the moment..its fun being eve,but were did my apple of my eye go and fail off sum wur adam and his friend steve lol.no more jokes how was adam and eve's relationship in the bible a great disaster from sinfully eating that apple? Causing infidelity and jealousy towards each other love for eve and adam..did he cheat on her i must know incase i find a loved one i can call my adam.just incase minus the apple eating part juan and i shared a apple out of sumone's garden.. now oops lost of words but im pretty sure sense im in charge of all living things its up to me to say sorry to but im no longer in love with you.i waited for juan way to long im no longer broken but fixed at heart and soul.im going to miss you if this henry is the one..im going to start henry and i like i first mett you and give him all great respect,honesty,loyal,trust,but he dont no what he has in store from me.its funny yup im a jackass and sumtimes wrong about the ugliest thot ever that could cause us hurricain weather or earthquakes big butt sanmai can i just get one that really does care about me and about my fathers commandments and saving souls to recieve the holy spirit?? And idc wat rewards or nothing about that ,expect nothin i just want to live happily sober minded and grow old together not lonely or all by myself antisocial ready to feel as i cause destruction but im not that far from it like father said i didnt come to bring you peace but to save you.are you going with me or staying??? Laugh now i can still hear you derrick james your so right the son of Lucifer i hoped not but the jealousy i felt your vibe from ducanville texas to ardmore were i reside..over a 14 yrs my son the ray of sun whom you direspected his mother and her father abba,you better set down and listen cuz ur much to say over good bye our old friendship..besides i alrdy know you cant keep your evil wicked hands to yourself,still punching on gi like she's a man ,and strong enough to fight you back.she's a mother of your childern how stupid and a idiot u look out to be.old habits are hard to change..i guess the scratching AND the monkey dragon was not enough of a message to you cuz ur really fudged brownie up with the spite of your tone in writing i can see right thru u..keep your love music to yourself i want no more from you but distance from u for a long time and im sorry for your mother and father for what u put them thru..sadness and worries of how they cant figure were they went wrong with you..having a beast like son someday may have to leave and part between heaven or hell sum all get left behind...if only you can change from now to then,only at peace with in youself soul and heart cut out the hate u have build up inside..i no you can derek im going to set with father from heaven when the time comes.im going to hate to judge or send you on tell hell helping abba out much as im directed told what do or do i just get to ser and watch as he does his job.. i forget to mention i come from the family of big Gods with the seal across my head.im the one who was able to open  the book of the seven seals and yes we are in court judgement as we speak.why do you think alot of people are claiming they hear voices? One of them is mine in hope to save as many souls as i can the time being...thy shall not murder is a commandment i haf to understand also meaning thy shall NOT murder thy self.or abortion i had time to think it over i no a few of my famil members had.i pray and hope father will over look the two i no off cuz your my love ONE'S.or  excuse you both for the keeping of my son ray.kept him clothed ,stable home,never hungry  and a great another mom..if i can save your ass from going to hell for that i be damned but a slight punishment you will have to accept i think punishment is 18 to 20 yrs.count back from the time you guys took a life..im greatful for having shelby i my life despite what smart mouth u have to say about anybody ya stop it.your not to gossip or act evil or wickedly jordan but its understandable ur mental illness or kinda like me? If you hear voices reason behind it all..forget the bolongna thearpist or quackes might say it bcuz your a chosen one like another of a david familt tree you come from.now its up to you to change your mean ways remain humble keep that mouth shut to save your gpa david of life.meaning no fighting or hittin kyla...just continue minding your boring ass business thats wat it feels like to me anyways..distant isolated from people ,anti social really no friends.start with keeping your mouth shut and hands to yourselfs,then teaching your soul and brain not think or say evil or mean things inside and ooutside that big head..its a start not church but saving urself in the long run after u find peace mean while training ur thots learn to educate yourself about the bible and sing and praise our father who art in heaven.he loves it ..the cars you drive and job u have them shoes and clothes you have aint yours read the bible find out whom they really belong too????GOD HE GIVETH AND TAKETH WHEN EVER HE FEELS like it..just want to share this bcuz i love my crazy ass family.now take in consideration about the part of hearing voices or learning to be humble first..anyways family and friends school is over almost over for the day..gud luck with self discipline stay blessed.