How Do I Get The Drug Addict Title To... Read Count : 9

Category : Poems

Sub Category : N/A

                               For the past 20 or more years of my drug addiction everyone that I have ran across in my life they all have said or thought that my own demons that I have been fighting against once again over the past eight years or longer after I was clean for twenty or more years of being clean and sober, everyone has always thought that my demons of addiction has not only taKen over my life but is also the most important part of my life, and in which when someone has tried to bribe me with my demon they all have failed cause to much of their own surprise I've been the one who has the demon in which they think has complete control over me and I'm the one who is able to walk away from this demon of addiction. Yes I do have a demon of drug addiction in which I've been working VERY HARD to get CLEAN AND SOBER, with the help of my loving caring best friend as well as my husband and we have been now for the last couple of years, I hate to be the one to break it to everyone but any kind of addiction just doesn't up and disappear overnight it's a very hard thing to overcome and you MUST FIRST OF ALL want to get CLEAN AND SOBER and you MUST HAVE THE WELL POWER to do so or YOU WON'T EVER BE SUCCESSFUL in being clean and sober. The only thing this time around that bothers me a lot is that I know that I've been able to KICK THIS DEMONS ASS ONCE BEFORE and now I don't know what THE HELL my PROBLEM is in why I can't just KICK THIS DEMONS ass AGAIN I've struggled more this time around than I did the last time I KICKED MY OWN DEMONS OF DRUG ADDICTION.




                                  I'm going to let you in on something that is different this time around then the last time that I kicked the demon of addiction right out of my life, which is last time I never touched Heroin like I've done this time around which however almost cost me my life if it wasn't for the luck of a couple of women in which I didn't even know them at this time I would NOT be here TODAY, my then addiction of Heroin in which I had really bad withdrawals from not having her (Heroin)  in my lungs or soul I Literaly thought I was going to die in which is why I can't just get rid of this FUCKING DEMON OF ADDICTION of mine because as SOON AS I  start to get the drug OUT OF MY LUNGS AND SOUL I start to FEEL LIKE I DID WHEN I WAS WITHDRAWALING FROM HEROIN.


                      Please, please, will someone please HELP ME get RID OF THIS FUCKING DEMON OF MINE I DON'T THINK I CAN TAKE MUCH MORE OF THIS SHIT. 



                     My Demon Addiction Is Meth in which my addiction to meth has taken pretty much all of everything that has ever meant something to me like for the most important example is my four beautiful wonderful children and now it's been taken its toll on my marriage which 

I've only been married for just under seven months (December 6th of last year is when I got married)  


             Donna Ruttenbur 



      

Comments

  • all the very best dear.

    Jul 18, 2019

  • Maurice  Beres

    Maurice Beres

    There is no magic wands to wave and make this issue disappear I’m sure you realize that You’ve been dealing with this roller coaster of addiction for many years You seem to have good support system and may have also gone to Other groups as well The bottom line is- and I think you know this- you have to face these demons head on with all the strength you can continually muster With every available support you can be part of It seems your doing much of this so persistence is vital os your back On that roller coaster We in this writing community can give you some support and encouragement So keep writing and sharing I wish there was other alternatives but with your years of dealing with this is it starts with you Best of luck 🦋🦋🦋🦋

    Jul 18, 2019

  • Finally! Someone to relate with! Fellow junkie here. Good words.

    Jul 18, 2019

  • Donna Wright

    Donna Wright

    To answer Maurice no actually I have never been to any kind of rehabs that's only because I can't do the whole in patient thing and not only that but studies have found that most people that go into rehab centers are more likely to relapse than someone like myself who does on their own with their own support group

    Jul 23, 2019

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