Category : Blogs

Sub Category : Miscellaneous

When Angela was very young; aged two/three or so, her mother and her father taught her to never ever say NO. They taught her to agree with them in everything that is said, and if she didn't, she'd be spanked and send up to bed. 

So, Angela grew up to be a most agreeable child; she was never angry and she was never wild. She always shared, she always cared, she never picked a fight, and no matter what her parents said, she thought they were always right. 

Angela the little angel did very well in school. And as one might imagine, she followed every rule. Her teachers beamed and said she was so well-bred, so quiet and so good, but how Angela truly felt inside.... nobody really understood. 

Angela had lots of friends who liked her for her smile. They knew she was the kind of girl who would go the extra mile. And even when she was feeling poorly and badly needed rest, when someone asked her for her help, she would always say Yes. 

When Angela was thirty-three,  she became a lawyer's wife. She had a home and family, and a nice suburban life. She was a mother to a little girl of four and a little boy of nine, and whenever anyone asked her how she felt, she always answered 'Fine'. 

But one cold night near Christmastime when her family was in bed, she lay awake as awful thoughts went spinning through her head. She didn't know why and she didn't know how, but she wanted her life to end, so she begged God who put her there to take her back again. 

And then she heard from deep inside, a voice that was soft and low. It only said a single word and the word it said was.... NO. 

From that moment on, Angela knew exactly what she had to do. Her life now depended on that word so this is what her loved ones heard... 

NO, I just don't want to. 
NO, I don't agree. 
NO, that's yours to handle. 
NO, that's wrong for me. 
NO, I wanted something else. 
NO, that hurt a lot! 
NO, I'm tired, and NO, I'm busy. 
And NO, I'd rather not! 

Her family found it shocking and her friends reacted with surprise. But Angela is now different, it is evident in her eyes. Her eyes no longer hold meek submission since that night three years ago; on the night when Angela heard the voice that gave her permission to say NO. 

Today, Angela's a person first, then a mother and a wife. She knows where she begins and ends, and she now has a separate life. She has talents and ambitions, she has feelings, needs and goals, she has her own money in the bank and an opinion of her roles. 

To her boy and girl, she says, "It's nice when we agree; but if you can't say NO, you'll never grow to be all you're meant to be. Because I know I'm sometimes wrong, and because I love you so, you'll always be my angels even when you tell me NO."

... 

"You don't get to choose how you're going to die or when. 
You can only decide how you're going to live."
- Joan Baez