Category : Articles

Sub Category : Motivation

Pain sucks! 

I know you are tired of hearing about the silver linings, and fed up with trying to “look on the bright side.” I know you are sick of putting on a brave face for the world, and you are done with people telling you that “the gain is in the pain".  

You are right, they don’t get it. They think your life is all rainbows and butterflies just because you mask your pain with smiles. They don’t understand. They only see the facade on the outside. They don’t know how you had soldiered on, how you had fought your way through the hard times, as if nothing is wrong. They don’t see the scars inside or the burdens you carry in your heart. 

Nobody knows how you struggle with pain and exhaustion underneath your smile. No one knows how you suffer from loneliness and confusion underneath your kindness, you hide it so gracefully, with ease. Secretly,  you pray that someone will notice the pain you are in. You pray that someone will help you, and maybe even save you.

You want an easy fix, a quick way to end the hurt. But you know it doesn’t always happen right away, and sometimes you need to be patient. You have to have faith, have hope, you have to hold on to that reassuring  little whisper that you will be okay again one day soon. If you  can be patient, you might be able to catch a break and find the light at the end of the tunnel.

Things don’t work out for a reason. Y ou don’t fail just to fail. You don’t fall down just to stay down. The letdowns, the stumbles, the heartbreaks – they exist to shape you, to help you grow, to teach you how to be resilient and brave. And if you are lucky, they might even teach you how strong you are. They force you to grow up, sometimes in a matter of years, and sometimes in just a matter of seconds. But in those moments, seconds, or years, you have learned that you are capable of getting through pretty much anything. And that realization is very special. So, give yourself some credit.

See, every single time you thought life has reached its absolute lowest, worst point, you always bounced back. Every time life crushed your heart, it still continued to beat steadily and powerfully. Every time you  thought your world was ending, you rose again. Trust me, eventually, you will feel okay again.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not making light of your pain. I'm not saying that those moments were not painful. On the contrary. I know you felt that pain and hurt deep down to your core. I know you felt the dread and the sadness pulse through every single vein. But can't you see how remarkable you are for enduring those moments? You were able to look for the diamonds in the rough. You were able to see the rainbow in the storm, even amidst the thunder and the pouring rain. I realize that enduring all of the unpleasant stuff has made you more sensitive, but on the flip side, it has also made you tougher. With each bruise, you have become more compassionate and with each blow, you have become more caring.

I wish I could tell you that because things will get better one day, you shouldn’t have to be in pain right now. I wish I could tell you that because you will be okay one day, you don’t need to suffer now. But I can't tell you any of that because  unfortunately, that’s just not how life works. I can however, tell you that you can’t always base your feelings on the outcomes. You can’t always decide to be okay now, just because you think you will be okay one day. You have to feel all the fucked up emotions that are fucking you up inside emotionally and mentally. You have to allow yourself to be sad or mad. You have to allow yourself to cry big splotchy ugly  tears. I know you have cried, and if you need to, go ahead and cry for a while more. Just don’t forget that your smile is hiding somewhere in those tears.

Since pain had made the decision to hang out with you indefinitely against your will, don't let it stay for free. Use it. Educate people with it. Let your pain teach others how to be kind. Let your tears show others what bravery and compassion look like. And when you are ready, let your smile come out again, and keep reminding yourself that you know, deep down, that you are okay.