Category : Stories

Sub Category : YoungAdult

Part 4
"Yo brother! What're you up to?"
"Nothing much. Trying to get through another day."
Laughter. 
"That bad, huh?"
"Yup."
"Well, your day's about to change."
"How so?"
"I'm back in town. Let's have drinks this evening."
"Sweet!"
End of call. 
It was in the middle of a hot Wednesday afternoon. Noah would have still been sleeping had his sleep not been interrupted by Ray's call. Hearing Ray's voice on the phone perked up his spirit. It was always good to hear from him. He and Ray have known each other since they were kids. They lived in the same housing area, went to the same school, got into many mischief together, and they have always had each other's back. Ray is the one friend he knows he can always count on. He trusts the guy with his life. Their relationship is so tight that they're more like brothers than just friends. 
Noah was still smiling when he lit up his cigarette. Even though it was the middle of the afternoon, he didn't feel the need to get out of bed. He prefers to laze about in bed all day and would only get up when his stomach starts to growl in hunger. A habit he had picked up after his life had spiralled downhill. He couldn't wait to see Ray. Before this, he only got to see him every six months as Ray was working in an Oil and Gas company in Indonesia. He had left that company and joined another Oil and Gas company in Dubai. 
Ray is an Engineer by profession and he has done very well for himself. He had also found the girl of his dreams out of sheer luck on one of his flights back to Dubai. Sonia; a beautiful flight attendant who had managed to capture Ray's heart. After dating for three months, Ray knew that she was the one. He proposed to her on the fourth month and they were married six months later. Noah personally felt that Ray was moving too fast but after meeting Sonia and seeing how much in love they are with each other, he didn't have the heart to say anything to Ray. Instead, he did what was expected of him as a brother; he was supportive of Ray's decision. Before Ray met Sonia, they both had made a pact that they would remain bachelors for the rest of their lives as they both felt love wasn't in the cards for them. But things changed. Now Noah is left all alone. 
At around six o'clock that evening, Noah rode his bike to Ray's house. The sky was dark with a promise of rain and the traffic along the highway was pretty heavy. He skillfully maneuvered his bike in between cars hoping he would reach Ray's house before the rain. Luck was on his side.
Ray was just as eager to see Noah. He was waiting on the porch when Noah rode up. After Noah parked his bike Ray threw the car keys to him. Noah got in the driver's seat and drove them to his favourite pub; Dragon's Den. The pub was located on top of another pub. It was previously owned by a friend of his but his friend had too many other projects to handle that she decided to sell the pub. 
After parking the car, they walked up the two flights of stairs in between two shop lots to the first floor of the building. There were not many people in the pub, just two tables were occupied. Noah did a quick scan of the pub with his eyes, a gesture that was quickly noticed by Ray. They then picked a table at the balcony overlooking the streets and other buildings and ordered their drinks. 
"Is there a reason why you picked this pub?" Ray asked with a knowing smile. 
Noah smiled. "No reason. I like the beer here," he said, trying to sound innocent. 
"You like the beer here, huh?" Ray laughed out loud. "It has nothing to do with the fact that it is in someone's neighbourhood?"
"What? No, of course not," Noah replied unconvincingly. 
"Whatever you say, brother, whatever you say," Ray said with a laugh. 
When the waiter brought their drinks, they made small talks, catching up with each other. Noah asked Ray about his new married life and Ray spoke about it for awhile. As he spoke about Sonia, Noah watched him. He could tell that Ray was truly happy and he was happy for them both.
"So who have you been hanging with?" Ray asked. 
"Nobody," Noah said. "I've pretty much been riding solo. I prefer it that way."
Ray was quiet for a moment. He studied Noah's face as he smoked his cigarette. He and Noah go way back and they have gone through both good and bad times together. Even though Ray has a brother who was the same age as Noah, his relationship with Noah is a lot closer compared to his relationship with his own flesh and blood. He and Noah understand each other very well and they know everything there is to know about each other. There were no secrets between them. Right now, looking at Noah's face, he could see the sadness in his eyes. He could guess what was troubling his little brother from another mother and he knew that right now Noah needed a friend he can trust in his corner. Ray knew apart from him, the only other person Noah trusted was Feira.
"So, you and Sheila patched things up?" Ray asked, breaking the silence. 
"Nah. That ship has sailed," Noah said nonchalantly. 
"It has? For real?"
Noah let out a big sigh. He lit a cigarette, took a long drag and blew out the smoke slowly. He looked up to see Ray watching him. 
"I'm just tired, you know? Tired of all the manipulation and mind games. I'm tired of all her drama. Everything is a circus with her. I'm tired of being paraded around like her trophy when she wants to mark her territory, and I'm tired of her public lashes when she doesn't get things her way. I'm sick of all her lies and her games. I've put up with all her bullshit long enough and it's exhausting."
"She's okay with you walking away?" Ray asked. 
"Whether she's okay or not, that's not my problem. I've given her far too many chances. I've tried talking to her and she keeps telling me she would change but she doesn't. She still behaves like a diva looking down on me and she still behaves like a spoilt brat when things don't go her way. How long am I supposed to be patient and tolerant? Would you stay if you're treated like dirt over and over when you have been doing your best to make her happy, to please her the best you can? Would you?"
The bitterness in Noah's voice did not escape Ray. He had met Sheila on two separate occasions before and even he could see that she was a handful. He felt bad for Noah as he knew Noah has had a big crush on Sheila way back in high school. He also knew back then Sheila had not given him the time of day. She had looked down on Noah even back then. But after two failed marriages and she saw how Noah had made a name for himself in the entertainment industry, her tone had suddenly changed. All of a sudden she was the one chasing Noah, making claims that Noah had always been her crush, the love of her life. What bullshit! 
When Noah first told Ray that he was seeing Sheila two years ago, Ray had warned him to be careful. He didn't trust her. He could see that Sheila was a manipulator who uses people for her own benefit. But, Noah wouldn't listen. He had stars in his eyes. He was blinded by her beauty. He felt that his dream had come true when Sheila finally noticed him. Ray had a bad feeling about it right from the start especially when he learned that Noah had closed the door to everyone else including Feira.
"Has she tried to contact you at all?" asked Ray. "Somehow I don't see Sheila as someone who would accept rejection easily."
"That woman has been blowing up my phone, it's unbelievable! I refused to take her calls or respond to her text messages. I was hoping by ignoring her she would go away, but no! She started posting crypted messages on her Instagram for me, dropping hints that she misses me, she loves me and all that fucking bullshit. I still ignored her," Noah said tiredly. 
"What did she do? Continue to blow up your phone?"
"No. She started writing a love fiction on her Instagram, using our story as her plot, and of course, I am the heartless villain in her story and she is the helpless damsel in distress. You can say that she stepped it up in her mind games."
"Damn! So what did you do?"
"I unfollowed and blocked her on Instagram."
Ray laughed as he lifted his beer glass for a toast. "You did the right thing, bro."
Noah excused himself to go to the men's room and Ray ordered another round of drinks. While waiting for the drinks and for Noah to come back, his mind was racing. He could see that Noah was in a bad shape even though he tried his best to hide it. Ray knew Noah was broke and was struggling to get by daily and he also knew that Noah has been worried sick about his mom. He knew Noah was going through depression and he felt helpless. He can't really do much to help Noah when he is all the way in Dubai while Noah is in KL. He would feel a lot better if he knew Noah had a trusted friend with him here. Feira immediately came to his mind. He was very tempted to give her a call to ask her to come join them at the pub but he stopped himself. He would never do anything behind Noah's back especially where Feira is concerned. He was torn between getting help for Noah and being loyal to him. 
"You seem deep in thoughts," Noah said as he approached their table. "Don't tell me you're already missing your wife?" he added teasingly. 
"Of course I miss her," Ray said with a smile. "But I was thinking about someone else."
"Who?" Noah asked. He was curious. 
"Feira," Ray replied, looking to see Noah's reaction. 
Noah tried to hide his smile as he reached for his beer. Taking a big gulp of the golden liquid, he tried to calm his fast beating heart at the mention of Feira's name. Ray is the only person he can talk to about Feira because he is the only person who understands the situation between him and Feira. Feira and Ray are a lot alike in many ways and he could only sum it up to the fact that it is because they both share the same zodiac; Leo. In fact, their birthdays are just a day apart. From the time Ray called him in the afternoon, he had been dying to pick Ray's brain about Feira. If anyone can accurately tell him what to do in handling his situation with Feira, it would be Ray.
"What about her?" Noah asked, curious to know what Ray was thinking.
"Have you seen her or talked to her lately?"
The wheels in Noah's head were turning. He had to think fast. He didn't want to tell Ray about the SoundCloud playlist he had made for her or about the text message he sent her to accompany the playlist. For some reason, he wanted to keep that a secret between him and Feira. For now. But he knew he had to say something to Ray as he could feel his eyes boring into him.
Ray was watching Noah closely. He could tell the wheels in his head was turning by the way Noah was fidgeting in his seat. He didn't push. Instead he leaned back in his chair and lit another cigarette while he waited for Noah to speak. 
"No, I haven't seen or talked to her," Noah said quietly as he prepared himself for what's coming. 
Ray took a deep breath and shook his head. 
"Why not?"
Ray's question was simple but Noah found it difficult to answer that simple question. He tried to stall, to think of an answer that would be acceptable to Ray but before he could say anything, Ray threw him another question. 
"How long has it been since you shut her out?"
Noah felt the heat rising up to his face. He could feel the sting of venom in Ray's voice and he immediately felt defensive. He tried to think of something to say that could justify his behaviour but his mind was blank. 
"Tell me, Noah," Ray said, breaking the silence, "what did she ever do to you to deserve this crap from you?"
Again, Noah felt the sting. He took a big gulp of his beer, averting his eyes from meeting Ray's. He knew he had behaved badly towards Feira and he also knew why - Sheila. He didn't want to miss his shot with Sheila so he had ignored and shut off Feira. Did Feira deserve that? Absolutely not. Feira had been the only girl who was honest with him right from the start. She had never played him or messed with his head, in fact, she has been nothing but kind to him even when he was unkind to her. He hung his head low, ashamed of his behaviour. 
"You know, the first time you introduced me to her, I was captivated," Ray said, shaking Noah from his thoughts. "Before I met her you told me that she was different. I didn't understand what you meant at that time but after meeting her for the first time, I understood what you meant perfectly. She is a passionate and compassionate woman, one in a million. She is a gentle and kind soul with an enormous heart. She puts others before her. Selfless. Loving. Caring and understanding. Yet you blew her off. For what? For Sheila. Was it worth it?"
Noah felt cornered, like he was being attacked. As much as he wanted to lash out in defense, he knew he couldn't as what Ray said was completely true. He was hoping to talk to Ray about his predicament, to get Ray's advice on what he should do. But not like this. 
"The second time you brought me to see her and we hung out at Darren's place, I felt something for her."
Ray's statement got his attention. "What do you mean by you felt something for her?"
Ray took his time to answer. He took a swig of his beer, lit another cigarette and looked Noah in the eyes. "I felt like I could easily fall in love with her,"  he said easily. 
"Whaaat???!"
"You heard me. And you know what else, bro? I even told her that."
Noah looked at Ray in disbelieve. He felt betrayed by his own best friend. He was pissed off. "How could you?" Noah spat. 
Ray smiled. "Why shouldn't I? She wanted you but you wanted Sheila. She deserve to be loved wholeheartedly by a man who can devote himself to her. You couldn't do that so why can't I be the one to make her happy?"
Ray knew Noah was shocked and pissed to hear his confession and he didn't care. He wanted Noah to see what he was throwing away.
As much as Noah wanted to lash out at Ray, he couldn't. There was a lot of truth in his words. Fact is, he had been greedy and selfish. He wanted his shot with Sheila and at the same time, he wanted Feira too. He wanted Feira to always be available to him, his back up plan in case things don't work out with Sheila. He knew he wasn't being fair to Feira and having Ray point out the obvious to him made him feel like a real jerk. Ray is right. Feira doesn't deserve his crap. He hung his head low. At that moment he felt like the smallest, worthless human being on earth. 
"By the way," Ray continued, "just so you know, Feira is not interested in me. In fact, she's not interested in anyone but you."
Noah perked up when he heard that. He lifted his face to look at Ray to see if he was joking. But when he said the small smile on Ray's face, he knew that Ray was telling the truth. However, just to reaffirm, he asked, "How do you know that, did she say it to you?"
"She didn't have to say it. It was all there as clear as day, written in her eyes."
Noah felt so much better hearing Ray's statement. But that feeling only lasted for a brief moment. He remembered what he wanted to talk to Ray about and he was worried about how Ray would receive it. He lit a cigarette as he toyed with his thoughts. He could feel Ray studying him. Like Feira, Ray could sense things about him even without him having to say a word. Knowing that opportunity may never present itself again, he decided to lay it all out. 
"What should I do, Ray? How do I make things right with her?"
"Before I answer your question, I need to know exactly what you mean by making things right with her."
Noah was at a loss for words. He didn't know how to put in words to explain his intention. But he knew he had to try because he needed some advice badly. 
"I want to be with her, Ray. I want to have a real relationship with her. I want to be her man in every sense of the word. I want to love her, care for her, protect her, I want to be her everything. But...."
"But what?"
"But after all that I've put her through for all these years, how do I face her? How do I assure her that I want her to be my only one?"
Ray smiled. "Easy. Change your behaviour. Put in the work to win her over. How she sees you now is entirely up to you. Will she see a changed man or will she continue seeing you as a playboy? Only you can determine what she sees. And my friend, let me be honest. It's not going to be easy. Not for you and not for her."
"What do you mean?"
"You have been a playboy all your life. You love the idea of having girls fall at your feet. You use your charm on girls just to get them in your bed. That has always been your play and Feira knows that about you. And after the last stunt you pulled, shutting her out, ignoring her, you better believe that she's got her guard up. It's not going to be easy for you to penetrate that wall let alone bring it down. But if you really want her and only her, you have to do whatever it takes to convince her. She's not going to make it easy for you, that's for sure. She's going to be watching you like a hawk and brother, let me warn you, one wrong move on your part, she'll be gone. And if that happens, party's over for you. You'll be dead to her."
Noah cringed at hearing Ray's words. He felt a tight knot in his stomach. He knew Ray was right and his confidence plummeted.
"So what do you suggest I do? Where do I start?"
Ray thought for a minute before he answered. "Both of you have a long standing history together. At the same time, you also have a special bond and connection that ties you both. I say take it slow. Don't rush it and don't push it. Go on her pace. Let her lead. Build up her confidence on you again. Win back her trust. You've hurt her badly, bro. That kind of hurt leaves a deep wound. Treat that wound and heal that scar."
As Noah rode home that night after dropping Ray back at his house, he made a detour. He rode back to the Dragon's Den and made his way towards the familiar streets he knows so well like the back of his hand. As he reached the bend, he slowed down. The street was empty and all the houses were dark. As he approached Feira's house, he slowed down his bike even more. He looked longingly at the room windows on the top floor, hoping to see Feira standing there. But all he saw was a darkened room. 
"Don't give up on me, girl. Don't give up on us."