Category : Poems
Sub Category : N/A
It started off when I was small,
Things smashing off the wall,
Mum and dad fighting all the time,
Little did they know what it done to my mind,
All the pain, trouble ,worry in my brain,
They drove me totally insane,
It all changed when I turned 14,
Many things I'd still not seen,
My life went bad that might in the park,
In the shadows amongst the dark,
Little did I know what was to happen to me,
Pinned to the ground in thier eyes I could see,
After that I'd never felt such shame,
Living with guilt hurt thinking I was to blame,
I then got introduced too Class As,
Never did I realise I'd be still using to this day ,
Turned 18 I gave birth to my little girl,
Then a call out the blue made my head twirl,
No way my mum suddenly had died,
My heart hurt hard all I did was cried,
Glad I'd made peace with her before she was gone ,
I had them bad feelings for far too long,
All I could do was carry on n be strong,
But from then on life was all wrong,
I then also lost my two little precious ones,
Three loved ones just like that all gone,
I then met a man who was to ruin my life,
At first I didn't think I could survive,
The abuse I suffered from him all the time,
Sent me crazy I thought I was losing my mind ,
I then went to jail to escape from him,
He selfishly took his life was that his last thing he could do to win ,
Good,bad,happy,sad and feeling blue,
All these feelings daily i go through,
Losing my mum kids and boyfriend,
Never sure if the pain would ever end,
Everyday taking crack speed pills and smack,
Needles in my arms leaving tracks,
Just wen i thought it couldnt get worse i found out my dad was dying,
I thought no way theh must be lying,
I couldnt believe i found out on facebook it was true,
No more loss i cant make it through,
Then confused lost and alone ,
Sat in my empty flat my so called home,
Then making anothet huge mistake,
My actions left me with more heartache,
I felt what did i do in life so bad,
To cause me nothing happy always sad ,
All ive ever wanted was to be truly loved,
I wished i had a guardian angel from up above,
All i seem to attract is pure using mugs,
Since i started taking drugs,
Violence,mental torture,sexual abuse too,
There is nothing left for anyone to do,
There is so much more for me to say,
But i block it out everyday,
As hard as it may seem i still have hope and a dream,
That so enough things will get better and brighter,
In my heart and soul i can feel inside lighter n lighter,
Now its down to me what i do from now,
Il find my way no matter how xx
©CLAIRPOTTS36
