Category : Articles

Sub Category : Self Help

Pfft. Many people like to write philosophy and crap. Lemme try.

Is it wrong to be inherently selfish? Why is it a taboo subject? From young, we are taught by our parents to always share with others, but really, is it really selfless or just an obligation?

When someone does something deemed as selfless, there is always a hidden benefit behind it. Care for others selflessly? That girl just seeks attention for herself. Donate millions to charity? Maybe they just want to have a good name for their company. 

I’m definitely not saying that doing these things are wrong. It’s just that it would be clearer if people would admit that no one acts only for others’ sake, and come clean with their motives, instead of announcing that they are truly going to sacrifice everything for others.

It’s worse when people think that if they are happy and well, they are not doing sufficiently for the people around them. Selflessness suggests some sort of huge sacrifice, like a mother physically protecting a child from a speeding car or a friend giving up their life savings for another friend. This places massive pressure on others to be ‘selfless’ and because their lives are going well and maybe their friends are going through tough times, they aren’t being ‘good friends’. 

I think if someone expects another to help them to the point of sacrificing their own needs and hard work, they can go fuck themselves. No one owes anyone a living to that extent. You live out your own life and take care of your mistakes.

Being clear in your selfish motives and laying them out would also prevent misunderstandings in the future in the long run. Seriously, I get that you have to bend the truth in that job interview but in friendships or long-term relationships, your motives have to be clear. Relationships is not just about sacrificing for each other, but understanding and working around each other’s wants and needs. Go ahead and be as obviously selfish as you want- the person would trust you more because you aren’t hiding unnecessary information from them. It might be the start of a larger conflict when they assume the worst out of you, and destroy hard-earned relationships with your peers.

All in all, I would say that it’s impossible for anyone to be selfless as we are naturally born with needs and survival instincts. What we really need is to come into terms with our selfishness and move on from there.