Category : Poems

Sub Category : N/A

It starts out as control.

You skip one 
Then a whole day
Then you skip 3 days 

Punishing yourself for the wrongs you do

It starts out as control

The pounds go down 
 First one 
Then 5
Then 10

It’s a euphoric feeling you can’t help but want to feel

It starts out as control

First you memorize little things 
The calories in an apple : 60
Calories in the rice mom cooks : 216
Calories in a slice of bread : 79

It becomes an obsession. You can’t eat more than 1,000 calories today. You had 1,126 yesterday. Can’t happen again! 
 
It starts out as control 

You lie 
you say you’ve already ate 
You say you’re full

Truth of the matter is, you cant and will not shove the 60 calories in that apple down your throat. It’s too many.

It starts out as control

The bones start showing 
First it’s your colar bones 
Then it’s your ribs 
Finally your back 

Shows you that you’ve succeeded. You took physical control of the body that took your mental power away. 

It starts out as control 

You lose what everyone around you has.
First love 
Then fear
Lastly control of yourself 

But to you it’s okay. It’s not like dying is scary anymore. There’s not much left of you anyway. 

It starts out as control