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I bang my head on the walls
counting the number of times I think of you
every time I get one thought of you
my head is against the wall
I tried to stop but
that was the only way
to stop the thoughts from hurting me

When I’m not thinking of you
I’m talking about you
I every word I say about you
have a blade mark on my wrists
Talking about you become less painful

The sight of you drives me
to light a cigarette
In every smoke I take
I forget your deceitful eyes
and conniving smile

A day can’t pass by
without taking a number of shots
and a bottle of wine
To help me forget
how stupid I am
to have believed in you

Embracing my fears became my joy
I wasn’t scared of drinking and driving anymore
I didn’t care to run from a mad dog anymore
People with guns didn’t scare me anymore
I had no phobias anymore apart from you

Every nap I take day and night
I get help from my sleeping pills
I didn’t care if I could overdose
I just wanted to sleep without any thoughts of you
Even if it meant sleeping for good

Your love have embarked me on
A Suicide Mission!