Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : N/A

Tuesday will mark 3 weeks that you walked away, and the gaping hole  where your part of my heart was shattered. I've come to realise that even though I fought with you for our marriage all these years, I fought for my place in your heart , I fought for so much, and even thought I tried to be the type of wife you could've been proud of.... I guess I never made the cut. Because you truly proved to me that a person who doesnt love can only be loyal to you for their convenience and once that dies out then the loyal disappears as well... Ive come to realise and not that it hurts any less but the fact that you never really loved me but loved the idea of what you can gain from me... That kills me ... yes nowadays I throw myself into work school and kids because its in those lonely minutes or hours if I'm not sleeping that I hurt ... because theres nothing  and no one to push it to the back of my mind and take first priority.... But in the stillnessof the night when the ligths out out and the house is still and settled... if you listen carefully you will hear the mournful cries of a broken women. A women who thought she found love, she found her solace in this world, a person who in her life blocked out the world with just a look in her direction... together you'll created the most beautiful of gems priceless in value 
and yet you choose to walk away.... 

There are time I want to curse you, and theres times I actually do. But even in times when Im sad mad and hating you for this pain I still love you. 

I pray god gives me the strengh to overcome this ordeal, and grant me a boon so I can pick up the pieces not just because of me but because of the three gems that you left behind as well...

I hope you find you peace amd what ever it was you are looking and I hope your deep thirst of been  single  has been quenched But I pray tge most that god gives you tge wisdom and the heart as well as the tools to lay to rest your issues and finally grow up and be a man that you should have been in the first place and not the boy that I had ....