Category : Poems

Sub Category : N/A

[Originally written in March of 2017]

   I feel like I am drowning inside and my soul got lost as my heart drops into my stomach of every second of every day.
   I feel as if I am trapped into a life I never belonged in; or that I can never sleep at night, because the peacefulness is to peaceful.
   There is no light through the rain nor the night and there is no light through the pain I am trying to fight.
   As I lay awake at night feeling so invisible, unimportant, and so scared of my pain getting worse.
   Being so afraid about what might happen if I can't feel better soon, as I lay awake at night; I am not busy enough to keep all of my thoughts out if my head.
   I eventually get the feelings of failure, the pain excessively increases as I lay there; I start to bawl and sob as I wish there was no tomorrow.
   Today arrives and I sob some more for there is a today.
   Although there is no other way to cope with my day, I just lush through it as I wish the same wishes; as if I was meant to feel like I am suffocating from the air.
   As I feel like I am drowning or suffocating, I also feel that I cannot feel at all.
   Is it possible I may be strong and weak?
   Is it possible I may just be weak rather than strong or strong rather than weak?
   How is one supposed to understand unexplained feelings, but without understanding it, it cannot be explained?