Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : N/A

Life takes on all kinds of twists and turns. Everything I experience, everything I go through in life, it is for a purpose. I can’t always see the reasons or make sense out of it all when things are going crazy, when I am faced with disappointment, or when things turn against me, even when things are going well, but the passage of time has a way of bringing things into clarity. All of it. Everything happens for a reason. 

Normally I am not one who looks for signs or scrambles to search for meanings or omens in the things happening around me, but today I saw something that did hit me in a powerful way. I just knew, and my spirit will leap within me; with recognition, and with an intuition that caused me to know that I would love one day. I have been seriously lonely for companionship and have been stuffing my hunger and desire for it into its regular little box, keeping it away from me. I didn’t realize how much it had been affecting me until today. When it happened, the feeling was like a pressure relief valve had been let loose within me. The effect was incredible and moving. It was as though I had been spoken to by something outside of myself. Déjà vu, intuition, God, wherever this assurance come from, I felt it deep in my spirit and knew there is someone out there for me. Maybe it was her herself, and her hand was reaching out for me. As though the nails of her fingertips were reaching through time and traced an electric touch across my soul as if to say, “I am here and I am coming for you.”

I was standing in line with some others in our cafeteria here at MetLife. I had decided to have a salad for lunch and I was waiting to grab a dish to go through the salad bar. Several ladies were making their way down the bar ahead of me and me being me, I stole glances and was checking them out. There were five of them and they were talking about work and picking different items. Maybe it was seeing so many different types of girls all together, or maybe it was one of those moments where the barrier between the past and the future is thin enough, when the membrane from one second to the next is stretched thinnest when I felt her touch. Here, in this moment, my dimension and hers meet, I looked at the ladies around me and something in me just knew. I knew I was going to have a girl of my own. She was out there, somewhere. For me, that is huge. Whatever doubts I had entertained about it were touched in that moment. I peeled my eyes away from them with a grin and began putting my salad together for lunch. 

My story is for a purpose. Some chapters are long and boring, others exciting, adventurous, tragic and some even stupid, but on every page the lines being written have all been a part of a plan. I received my sign today, and it gave me assurance. Sometimes you don’t have to see it to believe it. Sometimes you just have to believe.