Category : Diary/Journal
Sub Category : N/A
One of tbe hardest decisons came two days after I had my T.I.A. It was then I decided to change my outlook on life and start concentrating on what is more important... I've cut out just about everyone I knew and stared fresh as one possibly could. The only fuck up is im stil stuck in a fucked up marriage. I mean really is it that hard to love a person who has devoted their life to you making sure that your every whim is catered and executed. That everything and anything is to a T when you get home. Who knows shes has offers from hook ups to serious relationships and yet she keep choosing your sticking ungreatful ass over her happiness. Yeah that was me, now I'm doing what i should have done long ago. Thing is will the ever be someone who would love me the way I am ... Who will cherish me and thank god cause I have come into his life .... Sadly I dont think so ... cause good girls like me finish last ...fat girls like me dont get the sexy CEO's and the hunky hard working men who's in the BBW really. Or even the fact that I come with baggage.... Sadly no ... we dont get that but what we do get is the parasites that cant stop sucking the life force out of you. At night I lay in bed and fantasize someone loving me the way I should be loved .... Someone who will moce heaven and earth to be with me and show me that Im worth so much kore than Diamonds... Alas only that will happen in my deepest and most desired part of my subconscious.... For Good Girls like me finish last.
Comments
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@Erica...@Zee .... I totally agree with you guys .... its doesnt matter the title or thr ampunt of zero's next to that double digit ... what matters is how they love and cherish a person . It's just so hard, I literally feel like im stuck between a rock and a hard place....yes keeping faith and hope is hard when all one experiences is deception and betrayal.... but Now I understand what it means when they say in order to get up u have to continually fall....
Feb 06, 2018
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First up, that is one piece of brilliant writing. I love the raw honesty that i see in there. For that, i applaud you. Listen, I know and can feel your pain because I've been there too. Giving your all and only getting crumbs in return is a bad deal on so many levels. But.... never lose hope. You may not find a hunky CEO or some fancy dude but in the end, does that really matter? Job titles are just that - titles. What really counts is who a person is underneath the shell of exterior. Keep your head up, keep your faith and don't lose hope. There is a rainbow at the end of every storm. Be patient and wait for your rainbow. Take care and all the best to you.💜
Feb 05, 2018
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I have to agree with Zee. The perfect man is not in a job title, a chiseled face, or 6-pack abs. A perfect man is the one who sees you for the amazing woman you are and the one who will do anything to make you smile. You deserve nothing less. And if there's not a man right now that fits that description, you owe it to yourself to fill that role and recognize how awesome and wonderful you are ad treat yourself accordingly 😚
Feb 05, 2018