Category : Adult

Sub Category : Adult Romance

Must Have Been Love

By BlueHot Chronicles

Disclaimer: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of BlueHot Chronicles. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any previously copyrighted material. No copyright infringement is intended.

Author’s Note:

This is my first Merlin BBC fanfiction. It’s a romance/friendship (not one of my strengths in writing in my opinion, but practice makes perfect, hence my reason for trying) and Part One of a two-part story I have in mind. However, the way they will be written - part two especially - there will be no need to read them in any particular order. Part Two is going to get weird. This story is set between The Poison Chalice (canon up to then) and Lancelot (somewhat canon). AU between those two episodes and after Lancelot.

Summary:

Gwen and Merlin had become good friends in the few months since his arrival at Camelot, and thanks to their steady interactions, Gwen develops a crush. She soon realises that Merlin meant a lot more to her when he’d almost died after drinking poison. 

                                            ~~~(*)~~(*)~~~

Chapter One

Why do men have to be so clueless?

Guinevere, the personal maidservant to the King's ward, scrubbed gently at the Lady Morgana's dress when what she really wanted to do was beat it against the rocks at the bottom of the tub. Gwen - as her loved ones called her - had done the very thing her dear departed mum had told her to never do… she'd let a man kiss her. 

The maidservant squeezed the water from the dress in an attempt to ease her distress and humiliation, and she huffed as she blew at a lock of hair that fell across her eyes. Gwen hadn't actually let him kiss her, she'd done much worse… she'd kissed him… full on the lips!

And what did he do? Absolutely nothing! The guy just went back to business as usual. Although, he did say it was more than fine with him that she'd kissed him. Maybe… maybe he did like her?

But then, why would he continue treating her as just a friend?

Damn Merlin and his adorable blue, clueless eyes and goofy grin!

Daddy wouldn't object to him courting her, after all, Merlin was the Prince's manservant and daddy knew that she had no intention of becoming the wife of a knight. She wanted her husband to live past the age of thirty, thank you very much!

Merlin was a high-ranking servant, the most dangerous thing he'd be doing was going on hunts with the Prince to pack or unpack the royal prat's things.

Laying the dress out with the rest of the Morgana's clothes on the drying board in the sun, Gwen was startled at a loud yell and a crash behind her; she spun around to find Merlin sprawled on his stomach, with a basket of what was most likely the Prince's clothes rolling away, and her own basket in shambles under him.

"Oh Merlin, I'm so sorry, I should have already put away that basket. Are you alright?" Gwen rushed to his side and looked down at him as he got to his knees.

"Ohhh, ow, yeah… yeah, I'm alright. I wasn't watching where I was going."

Gwen stepped back as he scrambled to his feet. She watched silently as Merlin hurriedly collected the few pieces of clothing that had fallen out of the basket, which had rolled to a stop a small distance away. He didn't look at her, and - noticing his red-tipped ears - Gwen crouched near her broken basket and began to scoop up the shards onto a larger piece to discard them.

By the time she'd finished clearing up the mess, Merlin was on the far side of the washing area. Usually, Gwen would remain for a bit to either help or chat with him, but his unnatural silence and the blatant way he ignored her said enough.

Without a word to him, she gathered up the now dried bedclothes from earlier that morning and returned to Morgana's chambers.

                                               ~~(*)~(*)~~

"Will that be all, my Lady?"

It had been a long and tiring day, and all Gwen wanted to do was get home. There was still much she had to do around the house before her father decided to leave off work, but just being away from the castle would be a balm to her aching heart… and ego.

"Yes, Gwen, but you've been really quiet for most of the day… what's wrong?"

Gwen sighed and looked down at her clasped hands. Despite the King's numerous tongue-lashings, Morgana had always treated Gwen like a friend and the girl thought of the Lady in the same way. They knew each other - have known each other - since they were ten, therefore, there would be no dodging the issue.

Ensuring that Morgana's chamber door was closed, Gwen flopped onto the bed facing her seated friend.

"I did something stupid, Morgana, stupid, stupid stupid!" 

Gwen sighed after her small rant, covered her face and peeked out of the space between her fingers to look into her friend's caring eyes. "I kissed Merlin."

With an unladylike shout of laughter and her eyes shining in delight, Morgana ran to her small breakfast table, picked up her full jug of wine and two goblets, shuffled back - with a demented grin - to the bed and poured them both a drink. 

Morgana placed the jug on her nightstand, and handing Gwen a full goblet of the expensive red wine, she forced her face into one of great understanding and patience.

"Do tell."


Chapter Two

"Good morrow, dad."

Gwen stood on her toes and gave Tom a peck on his cheek, before continuing to place breakfast on the table.

"Good morrow, my dear," Tom said, as he sat in his customary seat at the table, eyeing their breakfast for the morning, "I have a few pieces in the shop, lances... daggers, I'll barter those sometime today with Edmund and Argus."

Edmund and Argus were the closest Baker and Miller, respectively, to the Citadel. Their sons were guards in service of the King, and once in a while, Tom was able to barter the weapons and armours he made, for bread, flour and grains.

"Lady Morgana gave me the day off, so I'll see what I can gather from the Northwoods."

"Gwen… "

"I'll be fine, daddy, Ella and Belle are going too. We'll be alright."

"Why don't you girls gather at the Southwoods instead, the guard patrol there all the time." 

"Yes, daddy, hence the reason all the servants gather there. The Northwoods has more pickings to choose from, because everyone's too afraid to gather in there for long. Please, daddy... I'll brew my special ale..."

Tom fought a grin at his daughter's blatant manipulation, as she blinked doe-like eyes at him.

"Gwen, please be careful in those woods, you and the others. At least tell me Merlin's accompanying you girls." Tom knew that sometimes the Prince's manservant foraged for food with his daughter, and again, he hoped that one day the boy would ask to court her. He liked Merlin.

"Oh, yes, Merlin says he'd keep an eye out for us," Gwen said, shoved a piece of bread in her mouth and began to chew in the hopes that her distorted features would hide the lie.

Tom sighed and nodded, taking a piece of cheese with his bread. Perchance he would go hunting with Argus and Edmund, stock up on some dried meats and such so that his precious little girl didn't have to constantly do such a dangerous thing as foraging in the woods. 

                                               ~~(*)~(*)~~

"Urgh, I don't know what makes that pompous, self-absorbed dandy think that I'd ever want to be with him!"

Gwen and Ella shared a grin, as their friend ranted at the unwanted attentions of the wine merchant's son. Doron was one of the Prince's friends, on his way to becoming a knight and just as much of a bully as His Royal Pratness.

"Oh come on Belle! You can't tell me that those gorgeous blue eyes, the dark shaggy hair, and that muscular chest and arms don't do it for you."

"Well, apparently they do it for you, Gwen," Belle spun to walk backwards, and faced the others with an impish grin.

Both girls giggled at Gwen's exaggerated gasp of outrage.

"You know very well that's not true," Gwen held her basket in both hands behind her back and raised her chin, "I like the intellectual types."

"More like the skinny, big-eared and goofy types," Ella said, smirking wickedly, her caramel features too babyish to pull it off.

"Okay girls, lest spread out, and we'll meet back at this big tree for lunch," Gwen said, looking anywhere but at them.

"Ohhh, I smell an intrigue, Belle."

"I think you're right, Ella."

"You two are incorrigible. There's nothing to tell, and time's passing by as we stand here. Daddy already thinks we have someone looking out for us and I don't want him to come looking for me if we stay too late."

The three girls split up and walked into the trees at ninety-degree angles. Gwen sighed in relief, as she really didn't want to have the ‘Merlin’ conversation with these girls.

"We'll definitely hear more about this when we break for lunch, Ella!"

"I think you're right, Belle!"

Gwen rolled her eyes and grinned, who was she kidding? These girls were her closest friends after Morgana. Maybe they had some helpful hints too.

                                               ~~(*)~(*)~~

Gwen found redcurrants and strawberries, sweet cherries, apples and peaches. The heavier fruits she placed in the sack she'd tied across her body, the berries and cherries she placed in her basket, and separated by pieces of soft fabric.

Checking the sun, Gwen knew lunch was close and she turned to make her way back to their meeting tree. She paused mid-stride when she spotted Merlin sitting on the ground with his back against a tree... sleeping.

"Merlin! What are you doing sleeping out here in these woods? You do know it's not safe, right?"

Merlin had jumped to full awareness when she'd shouted his name, and now he scrambled to stand.

"Oh, I know it's not safe Gwen, and so do you, because imagine my surprise when I learned that I'm supposed to be watching out for you and the others."

Gwen bit her lower lip and looked away as Merlin continued his tirade.

"There I was, pumping water for Arthur’s bath when suddenly your father appears, thanking me for keeping you safe in the Northwoods; and all I could do was nod my head like the idiot everyone thinks I am!"

"Oh good, he doesn't know. That means we can stay longer," Gwen smiled carelessly, and began the trek to the big tree again, leaving Merlin to gape at her.

"Gwen!"

Merlin followed her back to the tree, which hadn't been too far away, and Gwen took off her sack and placed it and the basket at the base of the tree. Taking a few cherries, she turned to him as she bit into one, holding the stem before pulling it away with just the seed and tossing it.

"Merlin, have you ever heard of my special wine?" she asked, walking slowly toward him and brandishing another cherry.

Merlin stuttered and chuckled awkwardly, wiped his palms on the back of his pants as he looked at her from the side of his eyes.

"Sp-special… special wine?" Merlin swallowed as she sucked on another cherry again, "N-no… I've heard of your special ale, I-I've had wine before."

"Trust me, Merlin," Gwen flicked away another stem and tapped the last cherry against her lip, her eyes half-lidded, "you've never had a wine like mine."

Merlin gulped as his eyes fastened on the lips next to her tinted cherry... uh, the cherry next to her tinted lips.

"Do you want my cherry, Merlin?"

Gwen was really close to him now, and Merlin couldn't seem to tear his gaze away from her lower lip; his breath hitched when she chose that moment to lick and hold it between her teeth.

An electric current ricocheted between them as Gwen was standing so close to him, the front of her bodice barely brushing his chest. A cherry-scented air was shared between them as they breathed heavily. Merlin gazed down at her; Gwen could see a flare of something in his blue eyes as his head tilted toward her lip and the cherry next to it, and she wondered which he would take.

Gwen would never know, as something or someone, stumbling through the bushes had them springing apart. Gwen turned to see a horse grazing nearby, but even though she hadn't noticed the animal before, the rustling came from the trees on the opposite side of the clearing.

Belle and Ella, who'd obviously circled around and met up, stepped from the bushes and into the small clearing under the tree.

"Merlin, fancy seeing you here," Belle said placing her own basket on the ground with a relieved sigh.

"Hello, Merlin, how have you been?" Ella sighed as she slumped to the ground, "I haven't seen you around for a while." 

Their polite tones and the fact that they were fighting back smiles, told Gwen that Ella and Belle had probably seen the whole thing. Couldn't they have waited to come out for a few more seconds?

"Merlin's agreed to watch over us while we work, and in return, I'll make him a pitcher of my special wine, you Ella will make him your famous applesauce, and Belle you get to make him a coat like the one you made for my dad."

Gwen ignored the choking sound Merlin made somewhere behind her. She pulled a large piece of fabric from her basket to spread on the ground, so they at least had a clean spot on which to eat.

Belle made a tutting sound and pouted, "But Gwen, you're the best seamstress in the kingdom. How about, you make the cloak and I'll make him an ale."

"Ooh, Belle, haven't you realised yet, she went and pulled out the big crossbow. Only a handful of people know of Gwen's special wine. Someone's getting the royal treatment… Merlin."

"Ella… Belle…"

At the look of discomfort on Gwen's face, the girls ceased their teasing and began to pack the berries and cherries into smaller sacks, then washed a few of the fruits with water from the skins they'd brought. They placed the apples and peaches separately from some strawberries before everyone, including Merlin, sat on the blanket with the bowls of fruit in the middle.

                                               ~~(*)~(*)~~

A/N - In case some are clueless about the 'wine' talk Gwen had used, (Merlin and Gwen have no clue what I'm talking about either) take a listen to this song and others in the playlist next to it -https://youtu.be/Lxl1oqSNzG4

Or check out this website - http://www.izatrini.com/trini-dictionary - and scroll down to 'W'.

                                               ~~(*)~(*)~~

Lunch hadn't been as uncomfortable as Gwen thought it would have been. The girls talked about their private lives, the way they always do when they were out of earshot of any who would judge them.

Ella's stepmother continually forced her to do all the housework and clean up after her two older step-siblings, and Belle's father's illness was getting no better, considering he was still hearing voices of people that weren't there. 

Gwen was shocked that Belle spoke so freely in front of Merlin; she and Ella had warned their friend that others might think her father was under some sort of evil spell and have the poor man arrested, or worse, executed if suspected of having any form of enchantment on him.

"It's why I wanted to come with you girls today, he's... he's starting to see things now, and I know when I keep him eating only fresh fruits he seems to get better... it's why I go gathering almost every other day."

"You gather every other day!"

"Belle, why didn't you tell us?" Gwen asked, her eyes sad as she looked at her friend, "You know we'd help any way we can."

"Right, and if we're helping, you don't have to go so often."

Belle burst into tears and grabbed both her friends around their necks, pulling them into a hug.

"Thank you, thank you! God, I love you two so much," she wailed, her voice a high-pitched whine, "you are the best friends I've ever had!"

The three girls forgot about Merlin who was wishing he could make himself invisible as he looked away from the weeping mass of girly group hug. His cheeks stained red when a - rear patrol into the Northwoods - single guard happened upon the weeping and oblivious group of girls; spotted Merlin, and grinned at him suggestively before strolling away. 

Horror suffused him, and Merlin stood from the blanket and sprang to adjust the sacks hence later they could be properly tied to the horse. What did that bloody guard think he was going to do? Take advantage of three weeping females? He didn't even know what to do with one!

Finally, the girls cleared up the rest of their lunch, tied new sacks to their bodies, took up their previously emptied baskets and returned to their foraging in new directions.

Merlin would patrol the area of all three girls individually, and he started with Gwen. It was about time they had a proper conversation.

                                               ~~(*)~(*)~~

Gwen stood from the raspberry bush and laid a soft cloth over the berries in the basket, while heading for the cherry tree. Hearing a noise, she turned to find Merlin coming up behind her.

"Oh, Merlin, I'm so sorry, I forgot you were there." That's a lie, she thought, hiding a smile and resuming her gait.

"It's fine. Look, Gwen, can we talk for a bit?"

"Of course, Merlin, what about?" Gwen asked as they reached the cherry tree and she placed the basket on the ground. 

She turned to find a nervous Merlin, wiping his palms on the seat of his pants as he forced himself to look at her face. Gwen bit her lip at first but then gave him a small smile to hide her unease, brushing the hair from her face.

He walked closer to her, and cerulean eyes locked with those of honey brown.

"Gwen, we're… we're friends, and... " he exhaled when Gwen broke their gaze and looked down at her clasped hands in front of her, then hollow eyes peered back up at him, "what happened in Gaius' chambers was fine… but… I, I don't think it's a good idea… I mean… I don't want things to change between us. Do you understand?"

Gwen nodded, and smiled ruefully, "It's fine, Merlin, I understand. We're friends and it would be terrible if I - we were to mess that up."

Two sets of uncomfortable gazes flittered around the greenery of the woods until Gwen turned back to her basket and began picking the ripe cherries.

She was unsure of how much time passed before Merlin said he was going to check on Belle and Ella, and she waved him off with a smile. Gwen returned to the cherry picking, and slowly the smile fell from her face; her hand began to shake, but she continued picking the ripe cherries and placing them in the basket. Her breath caught in her throat and she looked up, startled, at the branches of the tree above her when something wet fell on her face.

Touching her free hand to her cheek, her breath caught on a sob and Gwen bit her lip. She hastily wiped the few tears that escaped and returned to her cherry picking, but after two minutes of the sweet fragrance clouding her senses, she left the cherry tree to find… anything else.


Chapter Three

About A Month Later

The castle was quiet in the early hours of the morning, except for the few servants that worked inside the castle itself, there was no one awake or moving about. 

Lady Morgana, however, had one day in particular when she requested Guinevere to wake her at the hour just before dawn. This morning, Gwen had woken her friend and drawn her a bath; she'd laid out the dress Morgana wanted to wear, then helped her into it once she'd dried off. 

"Will you be having breakfast in the garden courtyard, my Lady?"

"No, I'll be in the courtyard just outside the King's chambers instead. We're having breakfast together," Morgana sighed and stared blankly at the wall, while Gwen brushed and braided her hair.

"I'm sorry, my Lady, I know how much you love the solitude on this day."

Morgana smiled wanly as she rose from her seat and squeezed Gwen's hand absently. She went to stare out her window for a moment, peering out at the main courtyard before she turned back to her maidservant.

"You know what Gwen? Considering that my request for solitude this morning is clearly being ignored, then I will be spending the rest of this day in any way I wish."

Gwen smiled, glad to see Morgana's zeal for the day return. Morgana, however, noticed that her friend's eyes were shadowed; she wanted to pound some sense into Arthur's manservant... Merlin would be lucky to court a sweet girl like Gwen.

"His Majesty's servants will be attending us both this morning," Morgana said with an encouraging smile, "and I will be having lunch with him then as well, so the only time I should see you today would be for dinner."

Gwen's smile widened and the light in her eyes returned briefly.

"Thank you, my Lady! I wanted to do some gathering soon, guess I'll start today."

"Oh Gwen,” Morgana said, pouting, “do something for yourself, something fun."

"Gathering can be fun."

"I highly doubt this,” Morgana scoffed, arching an elegant brow, “Well, that's it, you leave me no choice, Gwen, I order you to go… um… oh! Go drink wine with those two girls - who don't hold a candle to me since I'm your best friend - and let Belle and Ella prattle your ears off."

Gwen laughed out loud and Morgana grinned.

"Ooh, and here, take this," she collected her full jug of wine and handed it to Gwen.

"Morgana, what are you doing?" Gwen chuckled, holding the heavy jug with both hands.

"I'm trying to make my best friend happy again."

Gwen's smile dimmed a little and Morgana eyed her grimly.

"You loved him, he became aware of it, and then he rejected you… now you need to move on. The right man will find you, Gwen, and his gain will be Merlin's loss. A loss of enormous proportions, that he will mourn for ages."

The maidservant grinned and blinked her eyes, "It was just a little crush, Morgana. I'm alright now."

"It was not just a crush, Gwen. Why do you think it hurts so much and for so long?"

Morgana hugged her friend, the jug of wine between them, and stepped back. Gwen was biting her lip and fighting tears.

"You will be fine, Gwen. Now repeat what I just said," Morgana intoned, holding her friend's shiny gaze.

Gwen inhaled, smiled tremulously and nodded.

"I will be fine."

"And you're going to drink wine."

The maidservant laughed aloud, wiping away a tear that escaped.

"And I'm going to drink wine… as soon as I've done some gathering."

"Gwen!"

"Just for an hour. I promise."

"Well, alright," Morgana said, and carelessly strolled to the door, opening it with a flourish, "just so you know, your hour started five minutes ago."

Gwen gasped, "Morgana! That's not fair," but she smiled and hustled out the door, thanking her friend as she passed.

                                               ~~(*)~(*)~~

Gwen knelt beside the large mushroom patch and set her nearly full basket next to her. She had about ten minutes again, and then she was going home to relax with some wine, on the log seat in the tiny yard in the back of her home.

Belle was coming over once her father left for his wood shop, but Ella couldn't get away from the mountain of work her stepmother had given her for the day.  Still, Gwen was really looking forward to relaxing for the rest of the day.

Morgana's words were still echoing around her mind. She didn't… hadn’t loved Merlin, it had just been a little crush. And yet, she'd let his rejection taint her waking hours and unfortunately, her dreams as well. 

Until this morning with Morgana, she'd trudged around the Citadel, desolate and a little miffed at her own conduct since kissing Merlin; not to mention her mortification at how effortlessly her affection for him was forsaken. 

The maidservant hadn't sought him out these past few weeks as she normally would have, and whenever Gwen saw him approaching her immediate area, she would quickly make an about-face and proceed away from him. She’d learned about several alternative paths to the main courtyard as a result.

Gwen plucked another mushroom, and paused as she sat back on her knees, pondering the weeks that had gone by; she'd cried… oh, how she'd cried. Belle and Ella had been a great comfort to her during that time, and now Morgana had helped in the only way she was allowed as a Lady of the castle.

Heat flared in her cheeks as her humiliation escalated. 

I’ve been wallowing around in self-pity like some lovesick ninny! Worst of all, I've lost a good friend because of my hasty and improper comportment. 

Morgana, Belle and Ella had warned her against her actions and she hadn't listened. It was about time she minded her friends' warnings.

The gaping emptiness around her chest area healed over, leaving a bit of a bruise, and she sighed aloud, smiling as she plucked the last few mushrooms. She was not going to cry over Merlin, not anymore! Her mother had warned her years ago, and Gwen hadn't listened - not to her mother, nor her girlfriends. Now it was time for her to learn from her folly and move on.

Two minutes later, Gwen was on the tree-lined trail back to the castle, when Merlin rounded the bend with a basket in hand. He saw her the same moment she saw him, and Gwen could tell from his sliding glances toward her, that he was waiting for her to bolt in the opposite direction or ignore him as she passed.

Gwen did neither. 

"Good morrow, Merlin," she said as they neared each other, and smiling brightly.

After a slight pause, he greeted her with a hesitant smile, "Good morrow, Gwen."

Gwen continued to stroll passed him when he said her name inquiringly.

"Yes, Merlin?" She looked up at him, still smiling.

"How are you?"

Looking into his sincere eyes, Gwen saw a friend that was genuinely worried about her. She felt the gaping emptiness wanting to return, but she firmly pushed it aside and kept her smile.

"I'm great Merlin. Morgana gave me an unexpected free day and ordered me to have some fun. So I'm off to do just that," she said with a firm nod.

"Th - that's good." Flinging his long basket backwards over his shoulder, Merlin turned to go but quickly turned back, stopping Gwen in her tracks again. "Gwen, we're still friends… aren't we?"

He didn't look at her, his gaze was somewhere at his feet, but Gwen could tell that if she said 'no' that it would hurt him.

"Of course we're still friends, Merlin, don't be silly," she replied, and placed a gentle hand on his arm, "I just needed some time to think things through. I'm just glad that my own silliness hasn't ruined a good friendship. Thank you, Merlin, for putting up with my moodiness."

Merlin looked up at her with a relieved smile, "Hey, I'm just glad we're still friends… I missed you."

"Oh," Gwen gave him a quick hug and stepped away, "er, why don't you come by some time today. Belle and I are going to try to finish a jug of wine without Ella."

"That sounds like fun. I'll come by after Arthur's finished training with the knights," he said grinning.

"Great, then I guess I’ll see you later, Merlin. Bye."

"Bye Gwen."

                                              ~~(*)~(*)~~

Gwen had spent a magnificent day with only Belle and three-quarters of the jug of wine for company. Merlin hadn't come. Not that she'd been waiting for him… she hadn’t… she just wanted their friendship to go back to the way it used to be.

Pouring the last bucket of water for Morgana's bath, she pulled the screen which the Lady retreated behind to disrobe before getting in the tub.  Gwen neatened the bed and plumped up the pillows, before taking Morgana's nightclothes from the cupboard and laying it down neatly.

Once Morgana was dried and dressed, Gwen tidied up behind the screen, and placed the dirty clothes and linens into the laundry hamper; finally, she went to close the open window.

"Oh no."

Gwen turned from pulling the drapery closed, at Morgana's softly spoken words.

"Everything alright, my Lady?"

"Gaius forgot to send my potion."

"He should still be awake, I'll go get it."

"Thank you, Gwen. I don't think I'll be able to remain asleep without it tonight."

"No problem, my Lady, I'll be right back."

Gwen pulled open the door to Merlin and his raised fist. He grinned and brandished a vial of yellow coloured potion.

"Looking for this?"

"Oh, yes, thank you, Merlin," Gwen smiled, and rolled her eyes in relief, "you saved me a trip."

"Yeah, sorry to deliver it so late, Gaius has an overnight patient, and he only just finished mixing this."

"Oh, well, thanks again."

With silent waves of goodnight, Gwen closed the door. Morgana was sitting up in bed and Gwen gave her the potion, which she opened and drank immediately. 

"Was that Merlin I heard just now?" she asked recapping the empty vial and giving it to Gwen.

"Yes, it was. Gaius has a patient and was only now able to mix your potion for you."

"So, you two are talking… you’re friends again?"

"Yes, we spoke only for a little while this morning, but I think we'll be fine when things go back to normal."

Morgana was fighting to keep her eyes open, and Gwen helped her lay back, pulling the blanket over her chest.

"Are you okay with that? Just being friends?… ‘s that what you want?"

Morgana’s voice slurred, and Gwen smiled as she stood straight, stretching her back.

"It doesn't matter what I want, my Lady," she replied, "if all he wants is my friendship, then that is what I'll give."

Morgana was quickly falling asleep, therefore Gwen blew out the candles and whispered a soft goodnight. 

The maidservant left the room and pulled the door closed behind her, hence she didn't hear Morgana's mumbled words.

"But… didn' say… you 'kay?"

                                              ~~(*)~(*)~~

Gwen placed the jug of wine under the log seat and next to the blanket she'd spread out over a thin, yet, comfortable bed of hay.

Her father had gone hunting and wouldn't be back for two nights, thus Gwen did the one thing she knew he would have complained about had he been there; she was going to lay on the ground, drink wine and look up at the stars until she got sleepy.

She wished Belle and Ella had been able to come like they did the last time her father had gone hunting. Gods, that had been enjoyable! Nevertheless, even without them, she was still intent on enjoying the evening.

Gwen was preparing a few slices of cheese in a shallow dish when a knocking sound nearby made her pause. She put the block of cheese away before she hurried to open the door.

"Merlin!"

"Hi Gwen, can I come in for a spell. I wanted to talk to you about something, but it may take a while… it will need some explaining."

"Of course, come in."

Merlin slipped through the door and closed it behind him.

"Is your father still at the shop?" he asked, as he watched her gather up the dish of cheese and a bowl of strawberries.

"No, daddy recently started going hunting with Edmund and Argus. He should be back within two nights," Gwen gestured at two mugs, "Could you grab those? Thanks."

Merlin, unsure of what was happening, took the mugs and followed her out a side door into a small but neatly kept yard. Some stinging nettle thickets and - obviously, hand twisted - bamboo formed the small enclosure. He took in the blanket and what looked like a jug of wine under a bench, and his eyebrows raised in understanding.

"Is fun-day still on?"

Gwen chuckled, "Fun-day, as you call it, is incomplete without some star-gazing. Sit."

As Merlin sat on one side of the blanket, Gwen placed a long, square-cut piece of log in the centre alongside him. On the log, she placed the mugs, cheese and strawberries; kneeling beside it - on the other side - she filled the two mugs with wine, returned the jug under the log seat behind them, and sat back with a sigh.

Taking one of the mugs and a piece of cheese, she peered up at the stars between the small clearing of tree branches above them.

"What did you want to talk about?"

After taking the other mug and piece of cheese himself, Merlin told Gwen about the man that had saved his life from a flying creature, and how he - Lancelot - wanted to become a knight.

"The thing is, only nobles are allowed training to become knights. I owe him my life and I want to help him. So I was wondering - since you are the best seamstress in the kingdom, ahem, um… if you would fashion a knight's tunic for him?"

Merlin told her of this Lancelot’s bravery and continued his, extremely unnecessary, extolling of the man’s virtues, before finally showing her an illustration of the crest that would be on the front of the tunic, and Gwen nodded.

"Alright, Merlin, this should be easy enough, but he'll need armour and probably a weapon as well. He can have the armour that I use, and I'll have daddy make me new ones."

"Would they fit? You're a lot smaller than him Gwen."

"Oh, yes," Gwen chuckled, "I use man-sized armour and now that those will be gone, I can finally get daddy to make the kind that I want and that would fit me."

Gwen told him of the self-taught swordplay she'd been doing since she was a little girl, and before she became Morgana's maidservant. Then when she turned ten, Elyan had taught her some moves and techniques and after he left, she'd returned to bashing at a fencepost she’d set up just a bit further into the trees from her home.

The evening passed with the two swapping childhood stories. Merlin told her about his best friend Will back in Ealdor, and Gwen confided in him about her friendship with Morgana.

At one point Gwen had risen and lit a torch that had been stuck in the ground just inside the barrier. Merlin found that the smoke emitted a faint fragrance of lavender, and as he looked around he noticed that planted at the base of the bamboos were geranium and rosemary shrubs.

Gwen noticed him looking, "No pesky insects. Why do you think we can stay out here for so long?"

Merlin leaned against the seat behind him, with his hand propped on a bent knee, "Gaius, hangs dried lavender around our chambers, I remember my mum doing the same thing."
  
                                              ~~(*)~(*)~~

Finally, the wine and snacks disappeared, and their conversation turned to star-gazing. Gwen was tipsy, and Merlin was glad to be able to relax with his friend like he used to. He'd really missed her… and her tipsy chattering too.

He gazed at his friend’s carefree countenance in the light of the torch, and smiled as she told him of the time when she was six, and she and her brother decided it was a good idea to camp out in the yard - in the same spot they were currently occupying - after their parents had gone to bed.

"It was really dark and he'd just finished telling me a scary tale, all of a sudden he pretended to get dragged off into the bushes. I screamed for mum and dad," Gwen snickered softly and looked up at the stars, "he had to do his chores and mine for two days as punishment."

Suddenly, Gwen gasped, "Ooh Merlin, look, there it is! Quick lie back!" 

Gwen lay flat on her back on the other side of the log and Merlin easily copied her position. The log blocked his view when he turned to her, and he pushed it down, keeping it between them, but at least now he could see her face.

"Look," she said, pointing up at the sky.

Merlin looked up at the stars as she'd directed… and squinted.

"What is that?"

"I have no idea, but it flies around up there often. I've been seeing them ever since I was a little girl."

"It could be a lightbug," he said, twisting his head slightly to study the tiny moving light at a different angle.

"That's what I've been thinking," Gwen said, giving him a quick glance, "but then I wondered if we'd be able to see a lightbug that was so high up?"

They stared at the moving light for a moment, then Merlin turned his head toward her and whispered,"It might be a magickal lightbug." 

Her head turned to him, and he quickly looked back up at the night sky, clearly fighting a grin and eyeing her from the side.

Gwen’s gaze returned to the sky with a thoughtful gleam, as she hid her mirth, "Hmm, a magickal lightbug, I hadn't thought of that. It's worth pondering."

She noticed Merlin's flash of scrutiny, but held in her smile and continued to observe the moving light. Merlin thought he would shock her with chatter regarding magick, and chuckled silently to herself. Gwen had no issue with magickal people, and she had been able to tell for some time that Merlin's thoughts appeared similar to hers, though he said nothing.

They watched as the bug zipped around, both silently observing it until Gwen gasped.

"Oh, they're going to do it! Watch this part, Merlin."

Merlin chortled at Gwen's excitement, but then his mouth dropped open when two other lightbugs flew over to join the single bug and made a triangular formation.

"I think it might be some sort of mating dance, you know, like what some birds do," Gwen said, gazing up, her lips parted in awe, "just look at how they move as one."

Though the bugs remained in the angular shape, they rotated in a circular motion for a few minutes.

"Now comes the best part, " she whispered. Merlin glanced at her quickly then back at the lightbugs.

They slowly got closer together, until they seemed to form into a giant lightbug. It flared brightly for a second, before shooting up into the stars and disappearing.

"Woah, that was amazing!" Merlin exclaimed, running a hand through his hair. 

Gwen sighed, "It was, wasn't it?"

"And you see this often?"

She turned to face him and smiled, "Ever since I was little, and they always do the same thing." 

Turning back to watch the stars, she remembered his teasing about magick earlier and smiled. 

"You know what, Merlin?"

"What?" Merlin lifted his head to study her, curious about her whispering.

"If they really were magickal lightbugs, then I think that sometimes magick can be beautiful and amazing. Honestly, I've always thought so."

                                              ~~(*)~(*)~~

TO BE CONTINUED