Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : N/A

A 20 Year Old Me. 

To live right. For yourself. Not in the sense of mistakes, i.e., telling fibs to people. Don’t do yourself wrong to satisfy other people’s selfish needs. Because if they truly care, it won’t matter and if they matter, they won’t care. 

They should love you for the fact that you are who you are. One who loves who they are, and even more so, one who is loving who they are becoming. 

Now, as you get older you meet thousands of people, each of which who have met thousands of people themselves. In this process people lose sight of who they really are, being the reason, or one, why your circles get smaller. People tend to trust people less. You have to let the shallow people into your life, just enough, to learn the lessons you need to learn or you may end up too old and just now learning the mistakes you should have when you were younger. 

You have a lot less to lose than you think when you’re younger, as you haven’t gained the insight of what starts to deem truly important in life until you realize your years are fading away. That realization comes from friends and family who die, tragedies that make you appreciate that it wasn’t you, or lucky that you made it through it yourself. Because it is true, that a day will come when it really feels like yesterday when we were all just kids, who’s job it was to just be happy. To not grow up. But, it happens and you do. 

Don’t be afraid to take the risks, they are small ones, but seem big to a younger person, as they have less to rely on from experience. You can always trust your gut. Really. 200,000 plus years of intuition and DNA will hint to you through perception and analysis to make the decisions to keep you alive or out of harms way, and keep you around longer to create memories to take with you as long as you want them to look back on. 

It’s your life to protect and other people will never value yours as much as you do. So if someone or something in a situation gives you a feeling in your gut, don’t be afraid to speak up, be wise and say “No, that’s just a dumb f*cking idea.” At that moment is when you will weigh the risk and reward, from experience, to determine if you trust yourself and others to make the right choices for you and each other. Which is a part of growth. 

I was too cool around people to wear a seatbelt in high school. Now because I am 32(now 34...) and comfortable in my own skin, I could care less if someone thinks I look cool or not. As it was one of the factors that helped save my life in an I.E.D. attack in Iraq. A little extreme, I know, but I know if the conversation happened, how dumb they would feel that their pettiness doesn’t justify the means. All because they have to respect my life experience. 

Stay true to who your Grandma sees you as. The real you. Cherish your life, and continue to learn from it. I assure you, IT WILL TEST YOU. Sometimes even shaking your entire belief system to the core. This is because nothing or no one can prepare you for the evils the world will deceive you with. 

You have 2 ears and one mouth, listen twice as much as you talk. Believe none of what you hear and half of what you see. If you expect the worse and hope for the best, you should always come out with clarity and truth, while never being let down. 

Never let others deter you from being your true self. Know that they are only there to teach you that exact lesson you learn as they pass through you life. 

You might as well cut the middle man, save the time you would’ve never gotten back, so that in the end you have more time to appreciate this thing and gift called life. Because if you disappoint yourself in the end, that is your regret. That is the loneliest feeling one can have. Because no one but you can try and come to terms with it all. By, then it’s too late to fix. When you had all that was needed to make it all fulfilling and meaningful all along. 

Stay true to your purpose and trust the wisdom you already have waiting inside you for you to discover, and that way you will never be wrong. 

I have soared with the eagles and slithered with the snakes, and when it was all was said and done, the fact that no one has ever had to second guess my intentions or character, leaves me standing proud. Because by staying true to those around me, they too could see that there was no lying in me. Sometimes that could change or even save another’s life, which only spreads more truth around for others to enjoy and experience. Oh, and lastly, be sure to exercise and brush your teeth.