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How And Why People Get Their Feelings Hurt?
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Category : Blogs
Sub Category : LifeStyle
People Don't Care About the Impact of Their Words: One author I read had a still-born child. Someone said to her something like, "You don't need to grieve. You should be happy because you have other children at home." It was not bad enough that she had had this experience, but then she had to hear this very calloused remark. It made her grief even worse. Maybe you have had remarks like this said to you? Hopefully, you were not one who said something unfeeling like this? People don't care as much about the feelings of others, as used to be the case. They have to express their opinion, regardless of the consequences, then someone is hurt, and maybe a relationship broken. People Are Too Outspoken: They may be very opinionated about other subjects, but this character trait invades every facet of their life, and people are hurt, sometimes for life if not forgiven. People Don't Think or Care about the Consequences of Their Words: This one is sort of like the first reason, but a little different. If consequences aren't important, then nothing will change in the person's manner. It could be likened to anarchy, where lawlessness is never punished. In this case, it is anarchy of the tongue. People Wear Their Feelings on Their Sleeves: This is not an excuse to hurt someone, just because they may be over-sensitive. Maybe they have become that way from some tragedy or situation in their life? Be gentle with everyone, as much as possible, and hurting this type of person or anyone will not happen as often. When a person has fibromyalgia, there are days they cannot be touched or hugged. Even touching themselves will hurt on their bad days. Treat others as you want to be treated, and as if their feelings are like having this disease---only extra-sensitive to words. Some People Want to Be a Victim: This type of person uses their hurts to gain pity or whatever they want from others. It could be said that they "collect" hurts for their own purposes. You need to have great wisdom and discernment to deal with this personality-type. Only God can give that kind of wisdom. If you must deal with them, look for the hidden needs behind this, and ask God how to deal with what you find. He knows each person's heart better than anyone else. With any of these reasons we have discussed, forgiveness is necessary for spiritual and health reasons, and so you can have peace in your life. If you choose to internalize everything what is said and done to you, there will be no peace. You will be in a continuous cycle of agitation and hanging onto grudges that will hurt your health eventually. There is an old book written about this subject by a doctor, if you can find it. The title is, None of These Diseases. Right after The Lord's Prayer in Matthew 6:14-15, Jesus said that if we don't forgive others then God won't forgive us either. That's a scary thought! The Lord's Prayer also has a part in it that says, "and forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us." Another spiritual reason to forgive is, once we do this God works in our life as well as the person who hurt you. Forgiveness is one of the hardest things to deal with in our lives. It doesn't always happen right away, but is a process that can take a long time. God is with you in this, if you trust him with the hurt and its consequences, but the result of peace is totally worth it.