Category : Poems

Sub Category : N/A

All of my scars, 

No matter how faded,

No matter how invisible they are to everyone else…

I can still see them.

No matter how deep inside they are buried, I can still feel them,

I can feel them searing into my arms.

Hurting more and more every time.

I look at them with disgust.

Only taking me back to that first tragic day, then to the next.

Seeing what I deserved,

The power of making me bleed,

To watch the crimson liquid flow from self skin.

I hate myself for it.

Never knowing when to stop, wanting to go deeper.


Thinking about the people who I loved.

Seeing the divide in us, seeing the pain,

all of the pain that I caused.

Even gave up sitting in the front seat, mom squeezing my hand, I look away and say that I don’t like being touched.

Looking at my left hand, my arm even, I tremble,

Only remembering what happened to hate it so much. 

Tears gathering in my eyes, threatening to come out.

I won’t let them.

Even as my hand is trembling as I type at this second I refuse to go back,

Hiding. 

I don’t want to hide but I also don’t want to be seen…

I’m confused.

I hold blades against my skin only to throw them away, silently cowering in a corner of my dark room.


I am not better, am I worse?

My left arm, my left hand.

They have never felt the same again.

Hoping for the best and only deserving the worst.

Looking for comfort in the ideals of a father I never had.

Trembling in the quake of a break down, fearful of what I might do next.

Will I find my old friend?

Will this madness finally end?

Will I find peace as I am told?

WIll I, stay here in this wretched world until I grow old?


I still see my scars, making out every single one.

It hurts me.

I tremble.

I’m a girl on the run.