Category : Stories

Sub Category : Romance

Have you ever kept things bottled up inside, making it your deepest guarded secret which through time had turned into something sacred to you? You are actually excited about the secret you are keeping and you are dying to tell someone but you don't because you are not sure how it will be received. Have you ever gone through something like that? Well, I have. For so long I have been keeping my feelings to myself. Not breathing a word to a soul, not even to him; the one who is responsible for all these feelings. I kept piling them up, stuffing them deep inside to the brim until it drove me crazy. 

Then one day, I couldn't take it anymore. All the compressed feelings were bubbling inside like an active volcano waiting to erupt. It was too much. I had to let it out. The lid blew open and it was beyond my control. I had to find an outlet to let it flow. And so, I began to write to him, about him. The ink that spilled from my pen was like lava spewing out of a volcanic eruption. And the words, they were all inspired by him. He is my muse, the source of my creative juice. Of course, no one knew. Yes,  I used him. I use him to create dope things about him because I can no longer contain my feelings. He is stuck in my heart and in my brain. He has become an extension of who I am.

The things I was afraid to tell him, I wrote them down. My feelings flowed openly for all to see. By doing that, I felt free for I no longer feel suffocated by my insecurity. With every page I wrote, I became more and more intimately involved. But is that enough for me? Is it enough for me to write about my feelings for him to him without him knowing they are about him? No.

The day came when I finally opened up my heart and bared my soul. I came clean and laid out a lifetime's worth of feelings of pure and raw emotions in each and every line. There was no stopping me then. I had to let them out and I did. That day, I said it straight to his face. I said.... "I want you."