Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : N/A

“You are beautiful, you are intelligent, you are amazing, you are worth it.”
 

“No! You liar!” I scream. 

'You are nothing but fragile, shattered glass. Your innocence has been seized by the impure mouths that drink from you. You are only made to make one’s life easier, and then you are thrown away.; you are used. Segments of your frame lie on the ground, others in the crannies of others shoes.You are broken, and you do not wish to be whole again.'

Tears gather inside of my eyes, and it does not take them much, not even one blink, to fall. 

'How will I possibly manage to assemble the remains of myself, when those around me insist on trudging on them, over and over?” You know what? I do not wish to be whole again, because that means becoming the person that I was, the person that I don't want to be, but the person that everyone expects me to be. That means being the girl whose score is perfect on every test, that means permitting my peers to treat me any way they wish, any way they see fit. I don't want to be that girl anymore, I will not be that girl anymore! I refuse to act as if I’m happy, I refuse to present a fraud ear-to-ear grin that pleases my friends, and those around me, those who are much too lazy to ask me how I truly feel, to gaze at my soul to discover my state of mind, instead of my face.'

I am not happy. 
I am not innocent. 
I am not intelligent. 
I am suicidal. 
And that is nothing but the truth. 

Copyright. 10.30.17