Category : Poems

Sub Category : N/A

I'm sittin here and I'm not to sure I'm thinking clear. 
Contemplating even writing this shit,I'm remembering my childhood and tears quickly fill my eyes,I wish all these painful trips back were all lies.
 My mother,sometimes she's the only one I despise. 
I wanna just ask her why,why did you never wanna be there for us? 
Did you just hate us? 
Or were you just disgraced by us? 
What exactly made you leave us all those night and days? 
Was the club and booze more important than the gifts God gave to you? 
I was only a lil kid fuckin raising your kid! 
I didn't know shit about cooking or what babies ate. 
But I figured it out without a doubt. 
My baby sister has grown up and moved out. 
She thanked me for being that mother figure and I'll tell you what,that shit switched my mind up. 
I love her to death and I'm glad I never gave up. 
But even now you put me down,and no matter what I do or how hard I try,you can't ever look me in my eye and tell me that I made you proud. 
You see how fucked up that sounds? 
It's hard for me to not hate you. 
Mind you I know I'm not perfect but the ways you have hurt me I would never do that to my own. 
You've had me arrested a couple times,you've thrown me and my son's shit out of your house at the drop of a dime,
you have said some painful fuckin things but still somehow I still look at you like you're my queen. 

                                -babiilove