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After for what felt like hours, the pounding, kicking and yelling finally stops. Instead, I hear the heavy snores of the drunk from the other side of my door. 
   I then climb to my feet, looking around in the pitch, blackness of my room. I don't need a flashlight to find my bed or dresser that contains my pajamas. I've been consumed in darkness for so long that I could see through the pitch blackness without relying on by source of light.
   I pull out one of my drawers that contain my pajamas to quickly change, then slumped on my bed with my head in my pillow. I try to think of something else. Something positive to steer my mind somewhere else in order to ease myself from tonight like I normally do. But I can't. Instead, I can only think of the darkness. The darkness that's around me with no ray of light to make things better. Not even a tiny spark that you find flying out of a crackling fire.
   I turn on my back and stare up at the ceiling. I can't help but think about the painful memories of my childhood years. The years when I would walk to school alone everyday and always see students being kissed by their mother and fathers before they skipped into the school building.
   I remember asking my mother once if she loved me. She only stared at me for a moment before walking away from me, leaving me feeling broken and in tears.  I remember going up to her and trying to hug her until she suddenly pushed me away and scold me for bothering her. And I'll never forget the time when her and my stepfather were arguing to the point he walked out, leaving my mother on the ground, sobbing. I tried comforting her by hugging her until she pushed me away so hard that I fell to the ground.
   "Don't touch me you little shit," she yelled. "This is all your fault! You're always causing trouble. Always trying to find ways to make me miserable. I should've aborted you when I had the chance but now I'm stuck with you! I hate you so much! No one will ever love you because you don't deserve to be loved!"
   Instead of crying or feeling broken like every time when she pushed me away, at that moment, everything around me became dark. I developed this deep hatred for her, so deep that I made every attempt to purposely make her suffer. Suffer the way I did when she told me those hurtful words. 

  Tears suddenly start streaming down my face. All the emotions of hurt, sadness, depression, anger, and hatred just came pouring out through my tears.
   I want nothing more but to escape this dark, cruel world. To be able to feel loved and cared by someone else that's meaningful to me.
   "Is that too much to ask," I shout.
   "I care," a voice suddenly says.