Category : Diary/Journal

Sub Category : N/A

     On days when color seems unnatural to me is the day when I write. Now, don't misunderstand me here, I write whenever I get the chance. Whether that chance be in school, my house, or even in public I write. It's my solitude and my way out of this Hell we call humanity. I build myself a land with words, worlds with paragraphs, and universes with pages. I use my vocabulary and my heart to speak my mind.

     But when color seems unnatural I write like my life depends on it. I write like my last breath could leave my body at any moment and I would be left as a limp lump on the ground. On those days, I write like my time is almost up. My reasoning for this is that I always imagined color to seem out of place when I know my time is almost up, yet I find it funny because nobody ever truly knows when their time is up. One moment everything could be going beautifully, and the next everything could be going so terribly. 

     I write to get the thoughts inside my head out. It's when I'm holding a pencil I feel free - like I'm able to do absolutely anything. It's when I can express everything I've ever wanted to no matter the situation. Not only that but it gives something for someone to read when I'm gone and buried six feet below the surface. It gives someone to see into my mind even if I'm dead and it gives someone the chance to see how I saw things. It gives someone something to remember me by.

     I write like I'm running out of time, so I can be remembered. I want my name to be passed onto nieces or nephews or, if I make it to the age of having children of my own, grandchildren. I want people to read the words that I spill onto a page and then flip to the next. I don't want them to read a page then stop because I have nothing to say, I want them to read on, so they read what I have to say. I want my relatives and descendants to know who I was before I died and not just be remembered as "some ancestor". 

     I want to be remembered because I spoke my mind. I want my name to be known, and I want my stories to be told. I do not want to be forgotten and my name die out like all the others. I want to stand for something, not lie down and let the onslaught hit me. I want to stand and fight for everything I believe in. If I die a martyr then so be it, I will have died fighting for a change that I want to see in the world.

     Is all of this asking too much? Maybe. Will it all have been worth it if I succeed? Most definitely. All in all, I write to speak my mind and to be remembered. We all write for different reasons and do not let anyone ever tell you that your reason for writing is wrong. If you write to have fun, then continue. If you write to only gain money and wealth, nobody's stopping you. Nobody's reason is ever wrong. That being said... What's your reason?